


Elements of Love

by LettersToShakespear



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Anal Sex, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Bofur may or may not love to drive Kili insane, College AU, EngineerStudent!Kili, Fili is a total hipster, Homophobia, M/M, Mental Illness, Ori is pretty sassy, Sexual Relations, Tag As I Go, VisualArtsStudent!Fili, amychophilia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-15
Updated: 2015-01-19
Packaged: 2018-01-12 13:58:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1187838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LettersToShakespear/pseuds/LettersToShakespear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Story Abandoned </p><p>Sophomore Engineering student Kili and Junior Visuals Arts Student Fili have an unlikely relationship; the relaxed hipster and the obsessive (okay maybe more than obsessive) clean freak who doesn't understand anything about art. At all. Period.<br/>Despite that the two are more than happy with one another, excited to be back at school after spending most of the summer apart. Yet the return to Rivendell University has it's own negative consequences, including a bigoted AC and his CA son. Not to mention Kili may or may not have some issues when it comes to being open about their relationship in public. Either way, it's a roller coaster of a ride and no one knows who will come out alive by the end of it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MoonQueen17640](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonQueen17640/gifts).



> This is gifted to Legolaslover1 for not only being a wonderful beta, but also for making this story possible! I wouldn't be able to make this without her! <3 
> 
> Feedback would be absolutely splendid, and thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Enjoy!

It’s the beginning of his sophomore year of college, only move-in day, and Kili is already done with absolutely everything. His roommate, Bofur, has disappeared to god knows where and isn’t there to help him move the mini fridge into the room. There are still a million boxes in the back of his car, and Bofur had _promised_ that he would help him out.

 

Legolas is the CA on his floor, which means that he’s going to be in for a torturous year and he doesn’t need that on top of his classes and trying to balance his love life. Chemical Engineering wasn’t the easiest major to have in the world, that was for damn sure, and the part that really takes the cake is the fact that Thranduil is their Area Coordinator. Great.

 

“Hey Kili, did you see-“

 

“Bofur. You help me move this stuff right now or I swear to god I will shave your head when you’re asleep tonight,” Kili growls.

 

Bofur looks at him with wide eyes, taking in the sight of the mini fridge and the waves of people that are milling about in the parking lot, opening trunks and pulling out all assortment of items needed to furnish a dorm room.

 

“Aw Kili, I was just sayin’ hello to Bilbo! It’s his firs’ day and he needed my help to find Taft Hall!”

 

The brunet instantly feels bad because he likes Bilbo, he really does, but he is so damn frustrated right now it isn’t even funny.

 

“Just help me bring the rest of this stuff up, yeah?”

 

Bofur and Kili have been lucky enough to get into Hoff Hall, the newest residence hall to be added to the campus. It’s all shiny and new with high ceilings and lots of space in the rooms. Not to mention that the bathrooms are absolutely amazing, even for them being community style. There’s a nice big elevator as well, but there’s a line about fifteen people deep, all the way from exasperated parents to overly annoyed college students. The two roommates don’t even have to look at one another to know that they will most certainly not be waiting to catch the elevator. Instead, they head towards the stairs, huffing and puffing until they finally manage to get up to the third floor.

 

By the time they get up to their room, Kili is boiling hot. As soon as the fridge is in the room he’s twisting his hair up into a messy knot and wiping at the sweat that has built up at the back of his neck. Of course, Bofur is feigning exhaustion, flopping down on his bed with an arm tossed across his face.

 

“I’m dyin’ Kili! I haven’t had a single thing to eat and I-“

 

“You promised you’d help me grab my stuff, Bo!”

 

“Get your boyfriend to do it!”

 

“Fee isn’t here yet!” Kili whines, grabbing onto his friends arm, trying to pull the lazy lump off of the bed.

 

“I promise as soon as we’re done we can go to the dining hall!”

 

“Alright, fine! But if this takes more than three trips, I’m going to slaughter you, Kili. And I mean it well and truly!”

 

Kili only smiles, pulling the door open only to be met with the familiar sight of a silvery-haired blond with a nasty smirk on his face.

 

“Killian. How wonderful to see you again.”

 

Legolas wears a feral grin, clipboard held in his hand and a pen in the other. Kili hates the way that his heart sinks, and he really, really hates the way he feels his shoulders slump.

“I’ve made sure that Finnlay is on the opposite end of the floor so that you’ll be using different community bathrooms. I can promise you right now if I ever see either of you entering the same bathroom, I’ll have you on dorm probation in a heartbeat.”

 

He wants nothing more than to punch Legolas in the face, to wipe that disgusting smirk off of his face, but Kili knows that he doesn’t need to start off the semester on the bad side of not only Legolas, but Thranduil as well.

 

“What do you want, Legolas?”

 

Bofur is pulling Kili back by the arm, a scowl on his face as he glares at the silvery blond. If anything, that just makes Legolas’ smile even wider, eyes narrowing as he looks at Bofur, taking in the customary hat that is always atop the man’s head.

 

“I need the both of you to sign this form saying you’ve moved into the room, etc. I can’t leave until you do, so be snappy about it.”

 

Bofur and Kili both instantly reach out for the clipboard and pen, just wanting the CA to be gone as soon as possible. A few flourishes of the pen later, and Legolas is backing away, lips moving to leave Kili with one last cryptic remark.

 

“I’ll be watching you, Killian. Best follow the rules.”

 

The words are laced with a dark threat, his stomach twisting up into knots because he doesn’t understand why people have to hate him just because he happens to be with a guy. A beautiful, talented guy who means the world to him.

 

“Don’t listen to him, Kili. Unless he wants to be reported for hate crimes or for unfair treatment, he won’t be able to do a damn thing.”

 

“His dad is the AC of the building, Bo, he could make my life hell.”

Bofur gives a long sigh before he reaches out and places a hand on Kili’s shoulder, a soft smile on his lips.

 

“Don’t you worry, Kili. You have plenty of people around who’ll fight for you and Fili, and that’s a fact. There’s no point in worryin’ about it until something happens.”

 

He knows that it’s true, but Kili can’t help but think that it’s going to be one hell of a semester. He’s just not sure if it’s going to be a good thing or a bad thing.

 

 

* * *

 

 

It takes a little bit, but they finally get all of Kili’s stuff into the room about an hour later, the roommates flopping onto their respective beds with loud groans. The worst part is that they still have to unpack the boxes and totes full of stuff, decorate the room, set up the tv and the x-box and make-up the shelves.

 

Of course now that Kili wants to take a break and go eat, Bofur wants to just finishing unpacking and setting things up. So instead of going to dinner as planned, Kili finds himself plastering posters onto the walls. One of the posters is a mixology of drinks, the other a table of the scientific elements. Not that Kili really needs it. He’s had it memorized since the end of his first semester freshman year. There’s a bioshock poster, and another of Heath Ledger as The Joker. Kili had been half in love with the deceased star for over a decade.

 

Bofur on the other hand is sorting through wires and cables, swearing as he manages to hook up the television and the gaming system. Kili moves on to the fridge and then starts working on making his bed, throwing his stuff onto hangers and shoving his pants and boxer briefs into drawers. Everything is folded neatly, blankets smoothed down and pillows unwrinkled. Everything that Kili owns is in its proper place.

 

He knows that he’s a bit OCD when it comes down to being neat, and he can be a totally meticulous clean freak. The sad part is that he’d been even worse before he’d met Fili. Unfortunately, the blond had a penchant for leaving everything in one hell of a chaotic mess. To say that it drove Kili insane was an understatement, but that was just another reason why he loved Fili; all of his quirks and terrible habits that made up his wonderful boyfriend.

 

A large smile spreads across his face as he shoves some sodas into the fridge, eyes far away as he thinks about Fili. It’s no surprise then that he lets out a little squeak when Bofur throws a pillow at him, his roommate cackling as it connects with the back of Kili’s head.

 

“I know that dopey smile. When’s your boy going to get here, Kee?”

 

“Dunno. He’s five hours away from here and he didn’t tell me when he’d be showing up.” Kili shrugs and looks away, wrapping his arms around Bofur’s pillow and squeezing it tightly to his chest.

 

“How long has it been since ya’ seen ‘im?”

 

“Uhm.. A little over a month, I think?”

 

It makes Kili’s heart throb in his chest because he misses Fili so badly, misses his stupid smile, the way he would quirk his eyebrows, the feeling of his lips on his skin and the smell of his ridiculous shampoo, the one that smelled earthy because it was some all-natural brand. He misses the little touches and the hugs and the kisses, Fili’s laughs and everything, because over the phone and Skype just isn’t the same and-

 

“Hm. Must have had lots of phone sex, I take it.”

 

Kili turns a brilliant shade of pink, jaw dropping and eyes going wide as he stares at his friend in shock.

 

“I- Bofur!!” He’s instantly standing up and beating his roommate with the pillow, ignoring the laughs as the evil little bastard throws his arms up over his head.

 

“I’m just sayin’! You two go at it like rabbits an’-“

 

“Just shut up! Stop talking, stop thinking about it, just stop!”

 

Kili is so furiously embarrassed. He could kill Bofur for that smug smile that he has plastered on his face. And it’s only embarrassing because it’s totally true; he can’t even count the amount of times he’d touched himself while Fee was on the other end of the line, rough panting coming over the crackling phone, and he needs to stop thinking about it because now he’s just blushing even more. It’s something that Bofur doesn’t fail to notice.

 

“Nothing wrong with having a nice sex life, Kili.”

 

“That’s it, I’m going to get some food!” He speaks the words loudly, grabbing his ID and keys as he heads towards the door.

 

“Alright, alright, wait for me!”

 

* * *

 

They’re at the dining hall for a few hours, catching up with friends that they hadn’t seen all summer. Gimli, Ori, Bard and Eowyn all sit at a table, laughing and smiling and telling stories of their adventures over the summer. It’s nice because it’s a good distraction for Kili; it takes his mind off of Fili for a little bit and it makes him feel happy to see his friends again. Even Bilbo shows up for a little while, quiet and smiling, and Frodo, Merry, Sam and Pip all show up as well, loud and boisterous as ever.

 

After a while, everyone begins to drift off, still needing to unpack and go to the bookstore to spend a fortune. Kili and Bofur put away their dishes, trailing after their friends before they wave and move on to their separate ways. He doesn’t mean to, but he’s shifting into a sulky mood, just wanting Fili and he doesn’t want to go back to the room because it’ll feel stuffy. His chest aches with want and he didn’t know that you could be so completely homesick for a person.

 

Bofur senses his friends’ mood, latching onto Kili’s arm and pulling him towards a picnic table out on one of the many wide open lawns. They sit on opposite sides of the table, Bofur trying to cheer up the brunet but failing miserably.

 

“Just think, Kili, you’ll be able to spend all kinds of time with Fili now.”

 

“I’m taking nineteen credits, Bo. I’m taking calculus three. I’ll be lucky if I get any free time at all.” Kili knows that he’s finding any excuse to be grumpy now, but he can’t really bring himself to care all that much. He’s being a right brat, crossing his arms and laying his head down on them.

 

“You’ll figure it out, Kili, things will be fine.”

 

“What if he decides he doesn’t want me anymore because of how busy I’ll be? What if-“

 

“Oh, shut it, Kili. Now you’re just looking for reasons to be pouty. You mean the world to Fili. Trust me. He looks like a stereotypical blond whenever he’s around you, all doe eyes and with that dopey look on his face.”

 

He’s glaring at Bofur because of the insult, lightly kicking his roommate’s leg underneath the table.

 

“Oi! Be nice to me or I won’t let you in on a secret.”

 

A light snort leaves the brunet, scoffing at his friend.

 

“You don’t have any secrets, Bo, you tell me everything.”

 

“I’m telling you, I know something that you don’t know.” Bofur’s eyes are glittering and Kili wants to kick him again but he doesn’t because he doesn’t want Bofur to take revenge on him later. It’s like being in kindergarten all over again, Bofur being the little brat chanting “I know something you don’t know! I know something you don’t know!”

 

“I don’t believe you.”

 

“Wanna make a bet on that?”

 

“Alright, I’m sorry I kicked you. Now will you tell me?”

 

Bofur smiles widely, dark eyes glittering when he looks at Kili.

 

“I’m not sure that was very sincere.”

 

“C’mon Bo, tell me!” He’s got this sly look in his eyes and now Kili is frustrated and curious because he wants to know, dammit!

 

“Well…. There may or may not be a certain blond walking our way.”

 

Kili almost falls completely flat on his face as he quickly turns in his seat, eyes alighting on familiar gold hair twisted into a ponytail and the beautiful blue eyes that shine brighter than pools of water. Butterflies rise up and pulse in his stomach, blood rushing and he’s up on his feet before he even knows it, a stupid grin on his face as he runs towards the laughing blond.

 

“Fee!”

 

He collides solidly against Fili, arms wrapping around the blond as Fili lets out a little oof, breath knocked out of him by the force of Kili hitting him. The blond stumbles back and they’re falling onto the ground, Kili nuzzling into his neck as he feels tears prickling in his eyes because he missed Fili just so damn _much_. His insides feel fuzzy and warm and he aches inside and he’s placing little kisses all over Fili’s face before he’s nuzzling against his chest.

 

“Missed you so much, Fee.” He whispers the words and he’s hugging so tight and Fili is just laughing and smiling, pulling himself and Kili into a sitting position and looking into the beautiful brown eyes of his love.

 

“I missed you too, darlin’,”

 

Kili flushes at the nickname, wrapping his arms tightly around Fili because he never ever wants to let go, eyes scrunched up, nose sniffing and smelling at the blond because he loves how he smells: like a mix of paint, clay and earth and he just wants to memorize Fili all over again.

 

It doesn’t take long for Fili to push him away, flashing him with a dazzling smile as he presses his forehead against Kili’s, fingers tangling into the knot of his hair and tugging lightly. They’re rubbing noses and just breathing in deeply, Fili’s fingers rubbing into the nape of his neck before he’s pressing his lips to Kili’s, giving slow little movements until he’s nipping at full lips, tongue licking gently to make them part. Kili is more than willing to comply, sighs of happiness escaping him as he opens up, letting Fili probe and lick into his mouth and suck and bite and nip and-

 

“Alright you two, best move this somewhere else before you get cited for indecent exposure,” Bofur interrupts loudly, standing right before them with a wide smile on his lips. Kili doesn’t want to let go but he knows that his friend is right. There are already a few people looking over at them; some with scowls and grossed out looks on their faces, others with smiles at their happiness. Kili doesn’t like the way that they stare, dirty looks winning over smiles and making him feel uncomfortable and vulnerable. So he quickly backs away from Fili, standing up and helping the blond onto his feet. He does his best to ignore the little look that Fili gives him.

 

“Let’s go then. You can help me unpack. You’re so good at finding enough space and organizing things,” Fili smiles, hand reaching out as he laces his fingers with Kili’s.

 

“That’s because you’re a messy slob, Fee.”

 

“Hey! I’m not a slob! I’m just not very good at up-keeping!” Fili is looking at him with mock hurt etched across his face, his free hand clenched over his heart and fisting into the oversized sweater that the blond is wearing. It half hangs off of one shoulder, and he’s wearing those tight jeans that Kili likes, the skinny ones with the little rips in them and the hipster boots with the red laces that are all loose and barely even tied. It makes Kili smile. He has no idea how he ever ended up with such an artsy hipster, but he wouldn’t change it for anything.

 

“I missed you so much. All the way from your blue eyes to your _stupid_ moccasins that I know you brought with you.” Fili just gives Kili his customary relaxed smile, lips quirking as he squeezes Kili’s hand.

 

“To each his own, darlin’.”

 

Fili hip checks him then, and all Kili can think about is how badly he wants to pull off that oversized sweatshirt so he can place little kisses all over Fili’s slim waist and taught stomach. The grey thing is so long that it covers up that pert ass that he knows is hiding underneath, and Kili can’t for the life of him understand why Fili always has to wear such an odd assortment of clothes.

 

“Come on guys, wait till I’m gone at least, yeah? Its not even been an hour and I’m already sick from how sappy you are.”

 

Kili had honestly completely forgotten that his friend was even there until he heard Bofur groan; he’d been so enraptured in Fili that he hadn’t been aware of anything else. He wants to punch his roommate in the face when he starts waggling his brows at Kili, getting a look in his eyes that Kili doesn’t even want to think about.

 

“I’ll see you later, Bo.”

 

He drags Fili along by the hand, ignoring the way that Bofur cackles behind them. Cheeks flush red and Kili honestly really does hate how embarrassed he gets when it comes to his sex life, that’s for damn sure.

 

“Bo already driving you crazy, darlin’?”

 

“He keeps asking about very personal things that I don’t want to talk to him about.”

Kili is flushing, cheeks warm and he refuses to look at Fili who squeezes his hand gently. The blond just watches the way Kili flushes, eyes twinkling and a smile gracing his lips because his boyfriend is just so damn cute.

 

“You don’t like talking about our sex life with him?”

 

“Fili, shut up!” Kili is whining and he does not want to talk about this in public at all because what if someone overhears? He’s just private about this kind of stuff but Fili is so relaxed and laid back that he’s willing to talk about anything at all and won’t even bat a lash at it.

 

“He probably does have a bit of a right to ask about it, considering what he walked in on last semester….”

 

The flush on Kili’s cheeks turns a bright red, eyes going wide as he thinks about that horrifyingly embarrassing moment and oh _god_. Of course Fili knows that he hates thinking about that particular memory and that’s why he’s bringing it up, trying to make Kili squirm and blush even harder. Fili can’t help that he loves when Kili gets so embarrassed and shy, he really, really can’t.

 

“We are not talking about that, Fili! We are never, ever discussing that ever again!”

 

He’s glaring at Fili but the blond only smiles, blue eyes twinkling and fingers reaching up to card through his ponytail. Part of him wants to kiss him and the other part of him wants to pinch his sides because he knows how much Fili hates it when he does that.

 

“Alright, Kee. You’ll still help me though?”

 

Hopeful puppy dog eyes are pointed in his direction and he’s completely helpless to deny Fili when he has that look on his face. It always makes him feel so warm and happy because he’s the only one who gets to incite that wide eyed cutiepie look.

 

“Course I will. Did you already deal with Legolas?”

 

For once a dark look passes across Fili’s face, lips pulling into a little scowl before he wipes the look off of his face. The mention of Legolas was one of the only things that could put Fili in a bad mood.

 

“Yes. He’s the same bigoted asshole as always. He didn’t even have to say anything, just gave me one of those looks of his before he left.”

 

“Least he didn’t threaten you,” Kili mumbles, not really meaning to be heard by Fili. Of course he hears anyways, stopping in his tracks and making Kili look at him. He hates the way that Fili’s face is contorted into a scowling mask of anger, eyes glinting with murderous intent.

 

“What the hell did he say?”

 

“It’s not a big deal, Fee, I mean, he didn’t really threaten me, he just said he’d be watching and that I’d better follow the rules.”

 

Fili doesn’t drop it though, latching onto his words and storing them up inside of himself. He wants to ask more questions, to know exactly what Legolas had said but he can see that Kili really doesn’t want to talk about it.

 

“He’s not going to get away with treating you like shit, Kili, I’m not going to let him.”

 

“Can we not talk about it, Fee? I just want to be happy right now, okay?”

 

Fili grumbles and sighs but ultimately he wants Kili to be happy. So he drops the subject and  laces his fingers back with Kili’s before he tugs him along back towards their dorm. The rest of their walk is silent, but Kili doesn’t mind so much. He refuses to let himself linger on anything negative, not when he has Fili again. So instead of being sulky like he usually would, he instead basks in the presence of Fili, takes little glances to peer at his face, the pale freckles that smatter across his nose that you can only see if you’re up very close and the golden hair that shines beautifully in the sunlight. Kili could spend entire days trying to describe how beautiful he finds Fili, because he is an idiot when it comes to anything artistic or creative.

 

Fili knows exactly what Kili is doing, a little smile gracing his lips as he unlaces his fingers and instead loops his arm through Kili’s. There are still a bunch of people carrying things inside of the building when they get back, and Kili is so happy that he at least doesn’t have to worry about that anymore. They trudge up the stairs to their floor, waving to a few familiar faces as they walk down the hall towards Fili and Ori’s room. The door is locked when they get there, meaning Ori is off somewhere on campus.

 

Pulling out his keys, Fili unlocks the door and pushes it open, walking in with Kili close behind. The blond instantly looks sheepish as Kili takes in the sight before him, eyes going wide with horror and his mouth dropping open. Items are already littered all over the floor, books stacked haphazardly on the desk, tubes of paint and boxes of charcoal scattered around the floor. All of Fili’s clothes are piled up in a massive pile on the bed and the only thing that is in a safe place is the blond’s sacred camera that is securely placed in its case that sits up on a shelf, pushed all the way back against the wall so it doesn’t fall.

 

“Fili… I can’t- I don’t.. just- how, Fee? How did you manage this already, it’s not even the real first day and- I- I’m going to kill you. I am going to kill you, Fili.”

 

“I uhm.. kind of started unpacking but I wanted to find you instead?” The blond is smiling sheepishly, fingers running through his hair as his eyes dart around to look at the mess that is his half of the room. Kili on the other hand, has no idea where to start. He’s completely horrified and it’s just so damn messy. He is going to kill his boyfriend. That’s the only solution. He has to kill Fili.

 

“Sort your laundry.”

 

“Kili-“

 

“Finnlay, sort your laundry right now or I swear to god I’ll make you regret it.”

 

Fili nods his head dumbly because Kili barely ever uses his full name, so he knows he’s in trouble. Kili on the other hand is standing in the middle of the room trying to figure out if he should put all of Fili’s books onto the shelves or if he should put all of his art supplies away. He ends up settling on putting away the art supplies because he knows Fili will just toss it all around because he’s really honestly lazy when it comes down to it. Kili just doesn’t understand how Fili can be a visual arts major but throw all of his supplies around like they’re dirty clothes in a hamper.

 

Once he’s done with that he starts placing Fili’s books onto the shelves while Fili skirts around to hang up his plethora of shirts. He’d put everything else away in the drawers and even made his bed. Kili is so intent on what he’s doing that he doesn’t hear Fili come up behind him, arms snaking around his waist and pulling him flush against Fili’s chest.

 

“I put away all my clothes, Kee, and I even made my bed. Are you proud of me?”

 

Kili snorts and rolls his eyes, twisting around in Fili’s grip so he can face the blond. Blue eyes glitter and Fili is giving him that particular smile that he pulls out when he’s being a snarky little shit.

 

“Unbelievably proud, Fili. You’re finally working up to the hygienic state of a thirteen year old. It’s definitely progress.”

 

“Hm. Guess that makes you a cradle robber, doesn’t it? Have I been a good boy, Kili?”

 

“You’ve certainly been a messy boy. Messy boys get punished, Fee.”

 

Kili can feel a warm lazy heat building up inside of him, curling in the pit of his stomach and snaking outwards slowly. Fili’s grin is laced with feral hunger, eyes glittering as he tugs at Kili’s hand and drags him over towards the bed.

 

“Guess you’ll have to punish me, won’t you?”

 

Its been so long since they’ve actually been together that Kili doesn’t even bother to wait around for any more teasing, placing his hands on Fili’s shoulders and pushing him down towards the bed. Hands work their way underneath Fili’s sweater, rubbing his fingertips into the points of his defined hips while Fili starts mouthing at the line of Kili’s stubbled jaw.

 

Frustration slithers through Fili because he wants to touch every inch of Kili’s skin, but the brunet is hovering over him on his hands and knees now, kissing him lightly on the lips. Fingers slide up over Kili’s hips, gripping onto them as he pulls the brunet flush up against him. A little hitch of breath escapes Kili’s lips as he is pressed fully against Fili’s body, lighting up at the sensation.

 

It doesn’t take long before they are kissing roughly, tongues and teeth battling for dominance as they slowly grind their hips together, arousals building as they find friction between denim-clad thighs. Fingers trail beneath the waistband of Kili’s jeans, hands moving down to grab handfuls of ample ass as Fili rubs and kneads at the muscled area. A little groan escapes Kili’s lips and he can’t help but to rock his hips harder against Fili’s, seeking friction that will give him some form of relief.

 

The blond beneath him groans at the movements, lips parting and eyes scrunching up as he moves his hands up to press against Kili’s back. Pupils are blown and cheeks are heated up, a light sheen of sweat forming on his face. Hips rock harder, a loud moan escaping from Fili’s mouth on a particularly hard thrust.

 

“T-thought you were supposed to be teaching me a lesson.”

 

Fili is gasping and his blue eyes are wide open, teeth biting at his lips as he rocks upwards, just wanting more friction and touching and just Kili, Kili all over.

 

“Good boys are patient.”

 

Kili growls the words, smiling widely as he slithers down Fili’s body, pulling up his shirt and licking trails along hard abs. Hands hold the blond’s hips down, teeth nibbling and biting hard enough to leave marks and bruises, licking and sucking at the spots to soothe them. Nosing along the downy trail of hair that leads downwards, Kili licks, hands moving off of the blond’s hips so that he can pull at his belt, slowly sliding it out of its loops.

 

Fili is bucking up as he works at the zipper and button, sliding them down slowly as he pulls at the fabric so that the bulge within Fili’s boxers is exposed to his eyes. Lips part and he’s mouthing at the lovely erection that is hidden from his view, breathing hot and warm and Fili is keening as quiet as he can, bucking up and Kili’s mouth just feels so sinfully good he can barely stand it. It’s so hot and moist and it feels so damn good to have those lips on him even if it is through a thin layer of fabric. Curling fingers ease into the edge of Fili’s boxers, slowly dragging them down and-

 

“Seriously you guys!?!?!?!”

 

It’s amazing how quickly Kili flies away from Fili, cheeks burning an unimaginable shade of red as he looks at Ori then quickly looks away. If it’s even possible, Ori is an even brighter shade of red, a look of complete and utter mortification written all over his face. At least Fili has the decency to look at least partly sheepish and embarrassed, a lopsided grin on his face as he looks at his roommate.

 

“Hey Ori… Uhm.. sorry?”

 

Ori’s look of mortification quickly morphs into a vicious scowl as he glares at Fili, letting the door slam shut behind him as he throws his bag down onto the floor.

 

“Hey Ori? Really, Fili?! Is this how we’re going to start off this year, with you not telling me when your boyfriend is going to be over so I can walk in on you two all the time!?!”

 

Kili doesn’t even try to say anything, completely and utterly embarrassed and so upset that he doesn’t know what to say so he leaves all of it to Fili. The blond is easing himself up and shimmying his pants back onto his hips, looking up at Ori before he looks back down to re-zip and button his pants.

 

“I’m sorry Ori, really, we just got a bit carried away.”

 

Ori throws his arms up into the air as if he has given up, glowering at both Fili and Kili as he stalks further into the room, eyes narrowed as he pushes his glasses up his nose.

 

“You’re seriously going to play Mr. Cool and Relaxed about this, Fili!? I swear if I ever walk into something that even _closely_ resembles what Bofur saw, I will kill you. I will take your pretty, expensive camera, and I will throw it out the window!”

 

Kili wants to melt away and die and Fili is just smiling as he pulls down his sweater, sitting up and crawling towards Kili as he wraps his arms around him and rubs at his stomach. Ori looks absolutely murderous and it doesn’t take him very long at all to walk over and smack Fili upside his pretty blond head.

 

“Finnlay, you are being a right bastard right now, so stop smiling! You’re embarrassing the shit out of him! I have never, ever wanted to hear that noise coming out of your mouth and I certainly don’t want to see your boyfriend sucking your-“

 

“Okay, I’m leaving.”

 

Kili squeaks as he tumbles off of the bed, grabbing his shoes and slipping past Ori because this may not be as bad as the time with Bofur, but it is bad enough. He manages to get his hand on the door before he’s being dragged backwards by Fili, a small whine working its way up as he shoots Ori a pleading look, even though he knows he won’t get any help.

 

“I’m sorry, Kili, I really am. I didn’t mean for him to see, I promise. Stay? I’ve missed you so much.”

 

Fili is totally playing him and he wants to say no but he can’t because he’s pulling out those goddamn puppy eyes _again_. He knows that he doesn’t really want to leave, but he is just so mortified and he never ever wanted Ori to see him like that at all. Ever. Period.

 

Kili flashes a quick look over to Ori before he allows himself to be pulled back towards the bed, finding himself with a lapful of cuddly blond. Ori only rolls his eyes and sighs, letting it go because Fili has the most wonderfully content look on his face in that moment.

 

“I’m going to put the tv on now, and I’m going to be in the room. So your hands stay above the waist and not underneath any clothes. Got it?”

 

“Am I allowed to kiss him at least?” Fili asks as he burrows his face against Kili’s stomach, taking a great amount of joy in rubbing it all over the soft fabric of his boyfriend’s shirt.

 

“As long as it’s kept PG. I can’t bear any higher rating than that after how the both of you just traumatized me.”

 

Fili hums in reply, and it isn’t long before he’s fallen asleep with his arms wrapped around Kili’s waist, face still nuzzled close. Ori even cracks a tiny smile, nose scrunching up as he giggles.

 

“I really don’t understand how you two work, but I’m happy he has you,” Ori smiles.

 

“Sometimes I ask myself the same thing. It just doesn’t really matter because he’s my annoyingly relaxed hipster man and he makes me feel happy.”

 

“Yeah, he’s a bit of a dork.”

 

“Mm. But he’s my dork.”

 

They both smile at one another and continue to talk quietly, shooting fond looks towards the sleeping blond every once in a while.

 

It may not be how he thought the day would unfold, but it was worth it as long as he could be with Fili.  


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Sorry for taking so long to update this! I'm kind of slacking a lot when it comes to writing up new stuff, but I suppose that's part of living life as a college student, aha. 
> 
> Anyways, thanks for coming back to read more! 
> 
> Enjoy!

 

* * *

 

Kili had been hoping that the first week of classes would follow the same pattern as his freshman year. It’s far from that. Now that he’s no longer a newbie, the professors don’t give a damn about easing into the workload. By Tuesday he has forty problems for Calculus III, a quiz coming up in Organic Chemistry, as well as a chapter to read about the first law of thermodynamics for his Fundamentals of Process Engineering class. He doesn’t even want to think about the reading that he has to do for his elective class, Shakespeare’s Selected Plays.  He’d hoped to have a fun first weekend back, but it was looking more and more like he’d have to spend it doing copious amounts of homework.

 

 

 

He’s already running around like he’s crazy, stressing out and making up a homework and study schedule. Everything is all blocked out in different colors, and he’s still waiting to hear back from admissions on if they want to hire him to give the occasional tour or two to potential students around campus. Fili, on the other hand, is relaxed as ever, his camera attached to his hip and smears of paint already staining his golden skin. It’s infuriating.

 

 

 

So instead of hanging out with his friends, Kili is sitting in the library, books strewn out around him as he takes up an entire table. He ignores the glares of the girls that walk by him, scowls gracing their lips because he obviously doesn’t _really_ need an entire table to himself. Tight control is what keeps him from snapping, shooting his own glare before he looks back down to his math homework. Part of him can’t help but be distracted, knowing that he’d previously had plans to hang out with Bard, Gimli, and Fili, but he’d blown them off to work on homework instead. His phone was on silent and shoved into the depths of his backpack, all the better to deter himself from looking at the screen. If one thing was for certain, Kili couldn’t bare the idea of being guilt-tripped on top of all this homework.

 

 

 

So he sits and he does his homework, the lead of his mechanical pencil scratching down onto the paper as he writes out formulas and equations, fingers pressing swiftly at the buttons on his calculator. Mind lost in a swirl of formulas and numbers, he doesn’t notice a single thing that is going on around him.

 

 

 

It’s no surprise then that he is more than startled when he feels fingers tickling at his waist, a sharp yelp escaping his lips as he jerks his head up in shock. The pencil in his hand skids along the page he’d been working on, a line slashing across the paper and his heart pounding hard in his chest.  

 

 

 

A few people look up and shoot him exasperated looks, but all he can do is sit there frozen and wide-eyed because he’s still trying to recover from the shock of being snuck up on. Warm arms wrap around his chest, a face nuzzling against his neck until lips and stubble graze the sensitive skin.

 

 

 

“Hey there, stud.”

 

 

 

Closing his eyes, Kili breathes in deeply before he replies, eyes flicking open as he turns his head so that Fili can see the cool look on his face.

 

 

 

“You know I hate it when you sneak up on me like that, you jerk. And stud is out. It’s creepy.”

 

 

 

Fili only smiles, pressing a quick kiss to his temple before he pulls Kili’s bag out of the chair it’s occupying beside its owner. 

 

 

 

“Alright, stud is out. I still think cuddle-bug was a cute one though…”

 

 

 

“No, it really, really wasn’t.”

 

 

 

Kili sighs; Fili shooting him a grin as his eyes look over the table and his hand shoots out, grabbing the homework assignment the brunet had previously been working on. A small smile graces his lips as Fili looks it over, his nose scrunching up and little wrinkles of disgust forming around his eyes.

 

 

 

“This is what you’ve been doing, Kee? On a Friday night?”

 

 

 

The smile is gone almost as quickly as it had appeared. He doesn’t bother to say anything, just snatches the paper up and starts erasing away at the line that is now marring its surface. Fili watches quietly, gently biting at his lip before he lays out his body as much as he can along the table, covering up papers and books, his hand wresting on the calculator only to push it away out of Kili’s reach.

 

 

 

“I can’t help it that I’m already swamped with homework, Fili, I have to get it done and-“

 

 

 

“Kili, it’s the first week darlin’, you need to relax. You don’t have to get it all done tonight.”

 

 

 

“That’s easy for you to say, your professors haven’t given you jack shit to do!” Kili hisses the words, teeth bared as he glares at his boyfriend. The blond only takes it in stride, raising his eyebrows and looking at Kili softly.

 

 

 

“I do have homework. I’m just better at balancing it than you are. You just need to relax Kee, let loose and not stress out so much.”

 

 

 

He wants nothing more than to reply with a sarcastic comment, but Kili manages to keep himself from saying something that he’ll regret later. Instead he lunges over and gets his hands underneath Fili’s sweater, the blond trying to flail away as Kili presses on and pinches away at his boyfriend’s sides, a sharp yelp escaping his lips as he topples off of the chair.

 

 

 

Multiple people look over and glare, a few hissing for them to find a room or to get the hell out. A red flush crosses his cheeks, but it’s worth it, especially when he looks over to see Fili peering with wide eyes over the seat of the chair.

 

 

 

“That wasn’t fair, I hate it when you do that!” The words come out as a quiet whine but Kili only snorts at it, reaching for his calculator once more.

 

 

 

“You’re distracting me on purpose, you deserved it.”

 

 

 

“Kili, I just want you to have some fun! It’s only the first week and you’re already working yourself to the bone! I just want you to have some balance and you promised us that you’d come hang out…”

 

 

 

Part of him knows that he’s being ridiculous, but he can’t help it. If he puts this off, it’s going to just build up and then he’ll be even more stressed out! But he can’t ignore the twist in his stomach when he see the disappointed look in Fili’s eyes, the one that shows how upset he’s made the blond because he’s doing that thing where he centers his whole life around homework again. He doesn’t mean to, he really doesn’t, but before he’d met Fili his entire life had been a constant push of reaching perfection where his grades were concerned.

 

 

 

“God, I’m sorry Fee. I don’t mean to get like this, I really don’t. It’s like my brain’s hardwired from all the years spent doing nothing but homework.”

 

 

 

Just like that, the blond is smiling widely again, pulling himself off of the floor to sit back down in the chair, fingers running through his hair.

 

 

 

“I know darlin’, and that’s why you have me to keep you from turning into a crotchety old man,” Fili smiles wickedly.

 

 

 

Kili scoffs, giving him a playful shove before he cards his fingers through the blond locks. A smile graces his lips, his heart swelling up as he looks at his gorgeous, smiling boyfriend.

 

 

 

“I’m so lucky to have you, Fee. I’d be a mess without you to keep me in line.”

 

 

 

“Someone has to make sure you have some fun once in a while. Does this mean you’ll pack up for the night?”

 

 

 

“I s’pose so. But when I start stressing out on Sunday, you’d better not try to talk me out of doing homework, alright?”

 

 

 

“Deal! As long as you’re mine tonight and tomorrow, I don’t care. Now lets get going, hot stuff!”

 

 

 

A low groan escapes him as he looks at Fili, but he can’t bring himself to reprimand the blond when he has such a wide and happy smile plastered across his face. He knows that when it comes to Fili, he is royally fucked.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

By the time they get back to Hoff Hall, it’s around 9:00, the night just beginning considering it’s the weekend. Kili decides to drop his things off at his room first and to change into a pair of comfy sweats and a loose fitting t-shirt. It’s one he’d stolen from Fili, actually, and he loves wearing it in front of the blond because it always makes him smile.

 

 

 

Fili looks on in appreciation, eyeing up Kili’s lean stomach before it disappears beneath the swath of fabric. As soon as his blond realizes whose shirt it is, his bright blue eyes light up and a wide smile spreads across his face. Fili loves to wear Kili’s clothes, and he loves to see his own on the brunet as well.

 

 

 

“You’re so gorgeous, Kee.”

 

 

 

He snorts at the praise, throwing his hair up into a loose and messy knot as he watches his boyfriend.

 

 

 

“Oh yes, baggy clothes and messy hair. Completely attractive in every way.”

 

 

 

“I think you’re gorgeous in any kind of way. Whether it be rags or silk, you’re the most beautiful creature that I’ve ever seen.”

 

 

 

Kili’s cheeks turn a burning red before he pushes gently at Fili’s shoulder, grumbling as he walks away. He can’t help but feel flustered every time Fili waxes poetic at him, especially because Kili has never been really good with words, and he doesn’t ever know how to reply. 

 

 

 

So instead of replying he stands there with red cheeks, quickly turning away towards the mini fridge to grab a bottle of water. A wide smile breaks out on Fili’s face and he laughs, coming up behind Kili and wrapping his arms tightly around his waist. His nose rubs into the soft little hairs at the nape of the brunet’s neck, lips ghosting across skin before he begins to mouth down towards the knobs of his spine.

 

 

 

A light exhale escapes from Kili’s lips, allowing his eyes to slip shut as he relaxes into the warm embrace of his love. Strong hands slip beneath the fabric of his shirt, thumbs rubbing at the jut of hipbones whilst long fingers rub away at taught line of his stomach. Lips part on a long sigh, hands ghosting slowly up his body.

 

 

 

“Fee…”

 

 

 

“Wanna lock the door?”

 

 

 

It’s not even a question, Kili pushing the blond towards the door with a smile while he shoots off a quick text to Bofur. After the last fiasco, he’d sworn to always alert his friend before engaging with Fili.

 

 

 

 _In the room with Fee,_ is all that he says. He doesn’t bother to wait for a reply, not when Fili is walking back towards him, a wide smile on his face and hands reaching to tug at the cloth of his oversized shirt. Warm lips press against his clavicles, tongue licking at the jut of bone before Fili is pressing his teeth into the skin.

 

 

 

A warm blush of heat shivers through Kili’s body, his lips parting in a light sigh before he’s tugging Fili towards his bed. A small laugh escapes as Fili continues to press his teeth in, sucking bruises that won’t disappear for days.

 

 

 

It takes a few minutes to maneuver Fili towards the bed, pressing him back into the downy soft comforters and sheets. Bright blue eyes look up at him, lips glossy and parted as he looks up at Kili.

 

 

 

“I love you so much Kili.”

 

 

 

A bright bloom of adoration pulses in his chest, his cheeks aching from how hard he is smiling, his fingers running through blond hair.  

 

 

 

“Love you too, dork.”

 

 

 

Laughter fills the air as Fili tugs him down to press his lips against Kili’s stubbled cheeks, nose rubbing against the stark contrast of soft skin.

 

 

 

“That doesn’t mean much coming from you, Kee. You’re the King of dorks!”

 

 

 

A mock scowl graces Kili’s face as he flops down on top of the blond, ignoring the little oof that he makes as he slides his hands down towards Fili’s sides. Arms and legs frantically push against him, his boyfriend screeching as he tries to get away from the fingers that start to pinch gently at his sides.

 

 

 

“I’m sorry, you’re the best! The cutest and totally not a dork, I promise!”

 

 

 

He gives one more pinch for good measure, placing a gentle kiss to Fili’s lips before he pulls away. Warm arms wrap around his body, pressing down against his back whilst Fili rises up to press more kisses against Kili’s face.

 

 

 

They lay like that for a while, trading soft lazy kisses that make Kili’s head buzz with blissful content. Fili is the one who presses forward, sucking Kili’s plump lower lip between his teeth, licking gently before he bites down until Kili moans in pleasure pain. Fingers once more disappear beneath loose fabric, nails scratching idly up and down as Fili licks and sucks into his mouth, legs spreading so that Kili falls between them, groaning into Fili’s mouth when their steadily growing erections meet.

 

 

 

Even through the fabric of their clothes Kili can feel the pulsating warmth that exudes from Fili, his hips grinding up slowly against his own erection. Warm lips pull away from his own, breaths dragging in as Kili continues on to kiss and lick at the bared neck before him.

 

 

 

“Clothes _ngh_ off, Kee.”

 

 

 

“Wait.”

 

 

 

Fili grumbles but allows Kili to have his way for now, letting his head fall back as he ruts against the warm body beneath his own, bulges rubbing with each pass, making his body tingle and arms ache while he holds himself up.

 

 

 

Eyes wander back down to look at Fili after some minutes, half stifled moans leaving the lips that he desperately bites at. Kili can feel the nails that dig into his skin, half crescents that will take hours to disappear, but he doesn’t care. Not when he has Fili lying coiled into tenseness beneath him, eyes scrunched shut and face covered with a light pink blush. He watches, watches the way Fili’s eyes fly open when he grinds his hips down particularly hard, pupils blown wide and a little whimper leaving his lips.

 

 

 

“I- K-Kili if you keep I’m – I’m gunna come in my pants like a teenager!”

 

 

 

“I thought you liked it when I tease?”

 

 

 

Fili’s eyes narrow, fingers pulling up at the fabric of Kili’s shirt, brows furrowed in concentration as he replies. It’s made difficult by the way Kili continues to grind down, an impish smile gracing his lips. And Fili loves this, loves when Kili gets playful, loves the happy and carefree spark within the depths of those brown eyes.

 

 

 

“Not tonight. I need you, Kee.”

 

 

 

Really, that was all that Fili needed to say; Kili couldn’t seem to deny him a damn thing, and if Fili wanted it now, he’d give it now.

 

 

 

“Okay.”

 

 

 

He bends down for one more soft kiss before clothes are pulled off, jeans are shimmied off of hips and shirts are tossed onto the floor. Kili’s hair is already falling out of its messy confines, the strands hanging along the sides of his face as he looks down upon Fili’s flushed body. It’s been far too long since he’d seen Fili naked in person. (Skype doesn’t count, dammit!)

 

He wants to appreciate Fili’s well-defined abdominals, the soft trail of hair down his stomach and the well-toned arms. More than anything he wants to appreciate the lovely cock before him; nice and thick, head flushed a beautiful shade of pink, veins standing in stark contrast. Fili makes more than a few noises of impatience, but Kili just can’t take his eyes off of it, watching the way the infused length twitches against the blond’s stomach, clear beads of pre-come dripping onto all that lean muscle.

 

 

 

“Kili, I swear to god, you’d better do something now or so help me.” The words are an impatient snarl, one that makes Kili more than smirk. One of the only times Fili ever got frustrated or showed any unhappiness was when Kili was denying him something in bed. He can’t deny that there’s a sick twist of pleasure inside of him at that.

 

 

 

“You do something.”

 

 

 

Fili only pauses for a moment before his hand is flying down to his cock, fingers smearing through the pre-come to give a smoother flow. A sharp gasp stutters through the blond, fingers firmly grasping as his hand pumps smoothly at the flesh. Each upstroke is accompanied by the swirl of a thumb around the frenulum, his fingers dragging smoothly down the foreskin.  Kili’s own erection is burning with need by now, aching and dripping as he watches Fili, but he doesn’t allow himself to touch. Not yet.

 

 

 

“Do you want me to touch you, Fee?”

 

 

 

“Yes! Please! Please touch me Kili!”

 

 

 

Fili’s hand slips away from his cock, his eyes wide and his expression needy as he waits for Kili to finally touch. He’s waited for so long, been without Kili for months now and he just needs this so damn bad!

 

 

 

Tease that he is, Kili goes slow. Fingertips glide softly against hot skin, the entire length jumping from the barely there touch. Fili’s lips pull into a soundless _oh_ , the blond canting his hips to feel more, to get anything at all.

 

 

 

“Kili!” His name is a strangled growl, and maybe he’ll save the teasing for a different day. It doesn’t take him long to slither down and nuzzle up against Fili’s groin, fingers circling and pumping while he kitten-licks at the weeping head. His other hand is working at his own cock, trying to appease the ache that steadily increases.

 

 

 

It’s not long before Fili has his hands buried within Kili’s hair, nails scratching at his scalp as he tugs and pleads Kili for more. So he obliges, sucking Fili down and moaning at the feeling of having the burning length inside of his mouth again. It’s heavenly, the bittersweet taste of Fili on his tongue, dollops of come oozing out as he sucks and licks away.

 

 

 

He moans at the way Fili thrusts into his mouth, tonguing at the weeping slit when he gets the change. Each time he can feel the shiver that runs through Fili’s body, can hear the high moans that escape and feel the sharp pull at his hair.

 

 

 

“S-stop, want you to fuck me and I-I’m gunna come if you don’t stop!” Fili whines the words, tugging gently at Kili’s hair. He allows himself one last lick before he’s pulling off, crawling up the bed and fumbling around in the side table that stands next to the bed. They still need to meet Bard and Gimli and there’s not enough time for cleanup so Kili pulls out a condom along with the lube, fingers fumbling with the wrapper before Fili grabs it and opens it easy as pie.

 

 

 

Fili smiles fondly before he’s rolling the condom on, Kili’s breath catching at the first touch of his boyfriends hands. It’s a hazy mess of hormones after that, fingers smeared with lube and pressed slowly into Fili’s hole one at a time, two scissoring to open and stretch that beautiful little pucker.

 

 

 

Fili soaks it all up, tossing his head back and forth on the pillow as he thrusts down onto each stroke of Kili’s fingers, lips parted wide as he pants. Kili knows that Fili’s trying to get him to rub at that lovely spot within, but he knows his love so well that he knows just where to tease around. Each rub of his fingers circles around the area, and he only gives in to Fili’s whimpered pleas once he has three fingers inside, the tight walls working ever so hard to suck him inside.

 

 

 

So he strokes, rubbing gently against Fili’s prostate then moving away for a few thrusts, only to return with a rough drag of fingers. And _oh_ how he soaks up those sounds, the pleads of more and whimpers of “ _Yes! There! Please! Please!”_ He goes along with this for a few minutes before he gives in, squeezes lube into the palm of his hand and fists his cock before lining up against Fili.

 

 

 

“Wrap your legs around me.”

 

 

 

And Fili complies, lifting his legs up and wrapping them around Kili like he’s a koala latched onto its parent. Kili enters him in one slow, smooth glide, a harsh groan filtering through the air as he’s engulfed by tight heat. Black spots are dancing in his vision because it’s been so long and _none_ of his toys had felt like this back home.

 

 

 

“ _Fuck_ , missed you so much Fee, so fucking much!” Fili looks at him with wide eyes, sweat dripping down the side of his face as he releases a low whine.

 

 

 

“I- I wanna feel it, oh god Kili, I need you so bad!’

 

 

 

He doesn’t waste any more time, before he places his arms on either side of Fili’s head and begins to thrust, feeling the slick slide of his cock moving in and out, the muscles clenching around him and the nails that scratch down along his back. His love pants wildly, mouth moving to latch onto his shoulder to suck and bite, trying to dull the sounds. Each slap of his balls against that pert ass sends a jolt through his cock, lust and pleasure zinging through his body like bolts of lightning.

 

 

 

They spend what feels like forever and nothing fucking, sweat dripping down their limbs as the fall closer and closer to the edge of pure bliss. Kili knows that he’s close when he feels the tight ache that builds up at the base of his spine, the way his sack begins to draw up and his thrusts start to stutter. He can tell that Fili is close as well by the way that he bites down _hard_ onto Kili’s shoulder, nails _raking_ down his back in hot trails that he knows will ache and burn in just a short while.

 

 

 

“M’close, I’m gunna – I-“

 

 

 

Fili latches back onto the meat of his shoulder, a harsh moan escaping him at the sensation of the bite coupled with the sudden tightening of Fili’s walls, his body arching off of the bed as he shoots line after line across his stomach, cock completely untouched. Convergent sensations: the tightening of muscles and the pleasant buildup that jolts through his entire being, the sharp teeth and nails that dig, the lips parting on a drawn out moan as he feels himself tip over the edge, his warm release filling the condom.

 

 

 

Everything feels heavy afterwards, his cock slipping out wetly as he collapses on top of Fili. The blond lets out a little grunt, but soon enough his fingers are carding through his hair. They spend a few minutes in silence, Kili nuzzling up against his sweaty neck and placing little kisses wherever he can reach.

 

 

 

“You’re going to regret flopping down on me when you have to clean yourself up.”

 

 

 

“Don’t care. Wanna be close.”

 

 

 

Fili only laughs, rubbing idly at the bite mark on Kili’s shoulder. Teeth marks stand out clearly, blood already rising up beneath the skin. It’s almost broken through the surface of the skin. Fili almost feels guilty about it, but it’s soon replaced with a little smile. There are few things better than marking Kili up during sex.

 

 

 

“I love you so much Kee. Sometimes it scares me just how much.” The last part is hesitant, full of vulnerability. Kili slowly lifts himself up, looks down at Fili and gives him the softest of smiles.

 

 

 

“I love you more than I’ve ever loved anything. I understand.”

 

 

 

He feels somewhat dazed when Fili flashes him with his brilliant smile, lips pulled wide with simple, utter happiness, the dimples on his cheeks making Kili’s heart race. He could spend all day like this, taking in all of Fili’s facial expressions.

 

 

 

They spend a little longer lying on top of one another, but soon enough the come between them has started to grow tacky, not to mention Kili is more than ready to pull the condom off. It’s not until the comedown from raging hormones and high levels of dopamine that he truly begins to feel the soreness setting in. He does his best to hide the flair of pain that rises when he pushes himself up, the muscles in his back rippling. Kili can feel the burn of scratches upon his skin, his back aching from the rawness.

 

 

 

He doesn’t waste time in pulling off the condom and tying it, simply throwing it into the trash bin before he grabs the nearest towel and wipes his stomach down, throwing it to Fili when he’s done. His boyfriend watches his movements with narrowed eyes, fingers combing through his hair before he turns it into one long braid.

 

 

 

It’s only when Kili turns and pulls a clean pair of boxers on that Fili sees his back, eyes going wide as he makes a low and wounded noise.

 

 

 

“Oh my _god_ , Kili I am so, _so_ sorry, I didn’t mean to, I got carried away, I’m so sorry!”

 

 

 

And Kili has no idea what Fili is talking about, because yeah, there’s a dull ache running up and down the skin, but that’s normal. He feels thick and heavy and right after sex, so nothing really hurts all that much. And he _loves_ the scratching, loves the tingle and burn, the marks that last for so long.

 

 

 

But Fili is looking at him with wide blue eyes, quickly nabbing a pair of Kili’s boxers before he’s turning Kili around. To say he’s a bit dazed by the suddenness of it is an understatement.

 

 

 

“Fee, what are you even talking about, it’s fine and-“

 

 

 

“Jesus, Kee, It’s really, _really_ not.”

 

 

 

Fili is sweeping fingers down his back and _that_ makes him yelp, leaping away from the probing hands on instinct before he’s turning to look at Fili. He sees Fili’s horrified expression first, only then seeing the fingers that are sticky with blood.

 

 

 

Brown eyes go wide, and his mouth parts a little bit, instantly going to the full length mirror that they keep attached to the back of the door. He twists around as best as he can to see the damage. From the parts that he can see, there are bright red claw marks all along his back, most so deep that they are bleeding little rivulets down his back.

 

 

 

“I’m so sorry Kili, I didn’t mean to, I got so caught up and I hurt you and you’re _bleeding_ and oh my _god!_ ”

 

 

 

Fili is so upset, so painfully upset and Kili _hates_ it because Fili is supposed to be carefree and happy, not sad and upset, with tears welling up in his eyes and looking like he’s hunching in on himself.

 

 

 

“Fee it’s alright, it’s fine, I promise that it’s fine, I know you didn’t mean it, it was an accident.”

 

 

 

But Fili is still looking him at him with wide eyes, forcing him to go back and sit on the bed so he can look at what he has done. Kili protests, he can’t feel it right now and he says as much, but Fili refuses to hear it.

 

 

 

“Of course it doesn’t hurt right now, but it’s going to be terrible in a few hours! And tomorrow! And I’m so sorry darlin’ I’m terrible and I can’t even –“

 

 

 

“Fili, it’s okay. I promise you, no matter how much it ends up hurting, it’s all right. I _like_ the scratching, and it’s… well I think it’s uhm… really hot and I really don’t mind Fee.”

 

 

 

Fili doesn’t say anything for a few moments, Kili starting to feel a little bit nervous at the admission because he’d never really vocalized it before. Now that it’s out in the open and he can’t take it back, he feels that familiar ball of anxiousness tightening up in the pit of his stomach.

 

 

 

“I... Do you really like it that much?”

 

 

 

At the hesitant question, Kili slightly turns himself around, keeping eye contact the entire time that he speaks to his hesitant boyfriend.

 

 

 

“I really do. I mean... I don’t think I want to bleed every single time but I uhm… It’s kind of a kink? So please don’t feel bad about it? I swear it’s fine.”

 

 

 

Fili is still looking a bit hesitantly, but he nods his head in acceptance.

 

 

 

“I like scratching you… a lot. I just didn’t think I was doing it that hard.” Fili flushes a bit at this but holds his gaze.

 

 

 

“So it’s mutual, we both like it, so there’s nothing to feel bad about.”

 

 

 

Fili smiles lightly and nods his head, kissing him chastely before standing up and beginning a search for things to clean him up with. He pulls his clothes back on and heads out to grab some wet paper towels, rubbing gently at the bloody scratches. He makes Kili take ibuprofen and sprays his back down with disinfectant. Then he makes Kili put on a black shirt so if he happens to bleed through the fabric, it won’t be as noticeable.

 

“Now we have to go to Gimli and Bard’s place,” Fili smiles.

 

 

 

“They’re totally going to know we had sex…”

 

 

 

“Cheer up, you just got laid by your totally gorgeous boyfriend.”

 

 

 

This is followed by a wink at the end of the sentence, blue eyes twinkling so that Kili can only bring himself to shake his head and snort. They’re at least two hours late by the time they get to the room, Bard and Gimli giving them exasperated looks. The ginger mumbles something beneath his breath but doesn’t deign to repeat himself for Fili and Kili’s benefit.

 

 

 

“All right lovebirds, let’s get this COD marathon started, shall we?” Bard gives a feral grin, headset on and controller at the ready. There’s a bottle of vodka waiting on the little table in the room, shot glasses all lined up, and Kili _knows_ that this is going to be a long ass night.

 

 

 

And it is a long night, he drinks enough to get the perfect buzz, laughs with his friends and kicks Fili’s ass score wise when it’s their turn to play. They stay up until at least 2 in the morning, and they have a blast.

 

 

 

It makes him feel all warm and fuzzy, because he knows that without Fili, he’d have been holed up in that library for hours stressing out. But Fili balances him, gets him to let loose and have fun, and even though it’s hard for him to let go sometimes, he knows he has his ever patient boyfriend to guide him through it all.

 

 

 

Once their gaming marathon is over, they head back to Kili’s room, stumbling in as quiet as they can so as to not wake up Bofur. They crawl into the to small bed, giggling to themselves and clinging onto one another until they fall asleep. When Kili wakes up in the morning, flashes of pain and sharp stings crawling along his back, he almost decides to pinch Fili awake in retaliation for marking him up so bad.

 

 

He wants to be grumpy about it, hands slipping beneath Fili’s shirt to seek his revenge. But Fili wakes up from the touch before he can even give him a single pinch, golden waves tangled and blue eyes peering up with complete adoration.

 

 

Kili _almost_ regrets the throbbing pain in his back _,_ but It's all made worth it when he sees Fili's face break out in a soft sleepy smile. _  
_

**_TBC_ **

* * *

 

 

 

Thanks for reading everyone! Comments and Kudos are always appreciated, so don't be afraid to let me know what you think! :D 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, an update!!
> 
> Sorry for how long this took me everyone, Its been crazy and I just pretty much suck at updating in general, aha. 
> 
> But thank you for sticking around if you're reading this right now! :D I'm going to try and be better about it, but no promises. 
> 
> Also, I kind of suck at editing so sorry for any mistakes :) 
> 
> Enjoy!

* * *

 

Fili likes to think of himself as a relaxed individual. Much doesn’t upset him, and he’s always willing to chill with just about anyone. Some might find it ironic that he’s with Kili. He’ll be the first to admit that his boyfriend has some blatant issues to say the least. He’s obsessed with being clean and organized, and he’s so afraid of failure that he’ll allow himself to get overly obsessed with his class work. Fili does his best to mellow him out.

A lot of his friends (Ori mainly), can’t believe that he’s with someone as anal as Kili is. They don’t understand the way that Kili’s smile makes his gut twist. They don’t see the way that Kili’s eyes twinkle when he makes a joke, the soft smile that graces his lips whenever Fili is near. Kili might be a little obsessive over certain things because he stressed out so much, but he’s sweet and gentle, and he loves to braid Fili’s hair and give him hugs and hold his hand. He makes Fili happy.

And he lets him get away with scratching bloody furrows into Kili’s back, which is always a bonus in his book. The scratching thing might be a little juxtaposed to his personality, but he doesn’t mind. When they had woken up that morning, Kili had been more than sore. But he’d waved off Fili’s attempts at apologies, cuddling up to him instead. Bofur made gagging noises from his own bed.

 

Besides that weekend, they hadn’t had much time together. Between his schedule and Kili’s, there weren’t a lot of opportunities for them to truly spend quality time with one another. They had study dates, sure, but that wasn’t the same. He could only get away with kissing Kili’s neck so many times before the brunet would ban him from sitting beside him. Hell, they were only so many times that Fili could handle having sex with an exhausted Kili.

 

There was nothing he hated more than seeing Kili so stressed out all the time, frantic and exhausted with bags under his eyes. So he gets a hold of Bofur on a Wednesday night, convinces him to turn off Kili’s alarm because he knows that his boyfriend doesn’t have class until eleven. Yet he always wakes up early to start in on homework.

Bofur meets Fili outside of his dorm room, shoulders tight and fingers clenched as Fili makes his way down the hall. Fili’s quite aware of what that expression means. He’s about to get chewed out.

 

“Morning Bo.”

 

“You better make sure he is calmed down by the time I see him again, because he is going to _flip_ out when he realizes I’m the one who shut his alarm off. I am not going to deal with a pissy Kili for you, Fili.”

 

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure he’s fine.”

 

“He better be, or _I’ll_ be the one smothering you with a pillow.”

 

Lips tilt in a soft smile, and Fili isn’t really fazed by the violent words. Clapping Bofur on the back, he gives the man a wink before he goes quietly into the room.

 

Kili is curled into a cocoon of blankets, hair splayed out on the pillow and an arm curled around another pillow on his left. He looks so soft and relaxed, no lines of worry around his eyes and no frantic air surrounding him. Fili hates the way his heart aches at the sight, hates that it feels so good to see Kili asleep because it’s one of the only times that he isn’t stressed and running around worrying about homework.  

 

That’s why he’s going to try his hand at really getting Kili to relax. Which involves stealing Kili’s planner and forcing him to schedule out relaxation time every day so he can actually just sit and _breathe_ for once. Thankfully Kili has his planner placed on his desk, exactly where Fili knew it would be. It doesn’t take him long to flip through and find todays date, eyes going wide at how much Kili has written down. He’s planning to start working on an essay draft due in _two_ weeks! It’s not even a finished product that’s needed; it’s a damn draft!

 

Fili wants to buy Kili a vacation and make him go away, to just relax and drink some wine and have fun. Hell, to just do nothing! Kili would probably go crazy.

 

Speaking of crazy, he looks up to see that Kili is shifting around in his bed, lifting himself up and peering around with sleep stained eyes. It only takes the brunet a few moments to make eye contact with Fili. He watches the flash of confusion that goes through his eyes, head turning to look at his clock, and damn does he snap his head back around, jaw clenched and once soft look replaced with anger.

 

“Seriously Fili!? What the hell!?”

 

“You don’t have class until eleven Kee, it’s only 8:17.”

 

“I have shit that I need to do! I was supposed to work on-“

 

“What, your essay draft due in three days? All of your calculus problems that are due Friday but you’ll end up spending two hours doing all of tonight? Doing an analyzation of A Midsummer Nights Dream that only has to be three pages, but you’ll end up writing seven? And then what, you’ll go to your classes and your club meetings and skip lunch and not spend time with your friends, with me?”

 

He won’t deny that he’s more than a little pissed off, that he has allowed himself to get upset with Kili. Because he’s tired of seeing him so god damn consumed with stress and the need for perfection, he’s tired of seeing him have sleepless nights. He’s tired of never seeing his boyfriend; he’s tired of all the unnecessary stress and heartache.

 

Kili’s mouth is open in shock, eyes wide, shoulders slumped and fingers clenching onto the fabric of his blanket. Part of him feels bad, feels like maybe he shouldn’t have adopted a half yell, but he _can’t_ keep doing this unhealthy and vicious cycle.

 

“I – That isn’t – Fili-“

 

“Kili, the amount of work you do, the stress you put yourself under, it isn’t okay. You _need_ to relax; you have to have some you time. Just.. you schedule everything you do down to a t, so can we please just look through this, and you can shift things around and just put aside at least an hour a day for yourself? I mean, you don’t need to be writing an essay draft that’s due in two weeks, Kee.”

 

Kili’s voice comes out as a soft whisper, eyes trained on his blankets.

 

“But what if I don’t do it and I fall behind?”

 

“Kili, you can be an A student without stressing this much, without working yourself to the bone. You’ll never _not_ be an A student, you wouldn’t let yourself do anything less. So just.. you need to stop this. Please. Because I hate seeing you like this, and I know you’re not happy, and you just.. I never see you anymore. No one sees you, and it sucks,” Fili sighs.

 

He’s looking down at his hands as he speaks, because he knows that if he looks at Kili’s face, he’s going to start tearing up and that’s not what he wants to be doing this early in the morning. That’s all blown to shit, of course, when he hears soft little sniffling noises, head shooting up to see that Kili’s face is absolutely dripping as he continues to stare down, his arms wrapped around his stomach.

 

It takes mere moments for Fili to shoot up from his seat and crawl onto the bed with Kili, arms wrapping around him as he holds the brunette close. He feels guilty as all hell because he hadn’t meant to make Kili cry. The last thing that he wanted was for him to feel even worse.

 

“C’mon Kee don’t cry, I’m sorry, I just – please don’t?”

 

But he doesn’t stop, just leans against Fili and cries, and Christ does he feel like a piece of shit now.

 

“Shh, it’s okay Kee, it’s going to be fine, and I promise it’s all right.”

 

“B-but it’s n-not okay, I – you’re right a-and I can’t help it and I d-don’t spend enough time with you and I’m s-sorry!”

 

Quiet tears have completely degenerated into harsh sobs, and Fili doesn’t know how to make it stop, so he just keeps shushing Kili and rubbing at his back. He tries whispering to let him know that it’s going to be okay, he tries to do whatever he can, but Kili just seems to be so heartbroken over all of it that he can’t stop.

 

Fifteen minutes later there’s a knock on the door, and Fili’s heart is freezing in his chest. Kili tries to cling to him as he moves away, but he can’t just leave whoever it is at the door. Peeling himself away from his boyfriend, he tumbles onto the floor and makes his way over to the doorway. He shouldn’t really be surprised by who is standing there.

 

 

“You know, Fili, I wasn’t expecting you to be here when I came to check on Kili. There are some very worried neighbors looking after his well being, saying how he’s been sobbing. Your presence just makes this all the better.”

 

“Just leave it alone Legolas. He’s just upset, we’re talking.”

 

“I think it would be in Kili’s best interest that you leave, Fili, your presence is obviously upsetting him,” Legolas smiles, blue eyes filled with poisonous hatred and distaste.

 

“I’m not leaving him Legolas, this isn’t some case of dispute or fighting! I’m comforting him, that’s it!”

 

“If you don’t want to leave the room, I can easily make a phone call to public safety. They’ll have no problems with bodily removing you.”

 

And how he _loathes_ that sneering face, that holier than thou expression and the haughty airs that he puts on. Legolas is the finest example of bigoted white male that has ever existed, and Fili has half a mind to shove his fist down the bastard’s throat. For his own sake, and Kili’s, he’s trying to behave himself, but it’s a thin thread.

 

“Just leave it Legolas, please. Nothing bad is happening, I’m just trying to make him feel better, that’s all that’s happening. I’m not doing anything wrong here.”

 

“I could write you up, if you like. Your harassment of Kili will be put on record, and I’m sure if any more incidences occur, a request could be made for a campus restraining order.”

 

Fili absolutely snarls, whirls around and walks back to Kili who is watching with wide tear filled eyes.

 

“I’ll be back soon, Kili, I promise. Please just try to calm down, okay?”

 

“I- Fili…”

 

“I’ll be back soon, sweetheart, I promise.”

 

Looking back isn’t an option because if he does, he knows he’ll feel his heart tearing up just that little bit more. Legolas just watches with wide amused eyes, follows Fili down to his dorm as he storms down the hallway in anger. It’s not until he’s at his end of the hall that he whirls around to meet Legolas’ gaze, lips pulled back in a snarl.

 

“Listen here, you homophobic fuck. If you think for one god damn second that you’re going to treat Kili or me like shit because of your own fucked up agenda, you’re sorely mistaken. Make sure you check your email often, because I’m going to make sure that every advocate on this campus knows about this, and you can bet you’ll be getting a formal letter in your mailbox from College Court, you pretentious twat.”

 

Slack jawed and pale faced, Legolas tries to make words, taking long moments to work them out.

 

“I- You can’t-“

 

“What, threaten you? Just like you threatened me? You might think you’re hot shit, Legolas, but I have a news flash for you. There are more good, decent human beings on this campus than douche-bags like you, and I’m willing to bet on who’s going to win this case.”

 

“My father-“

 

“Who are you, Draco Malfoy? You can’t even fight your own battles, Legs, doesn’t that say something about you? I’m willing to put my status as a student here on the line to get you in front of that Court, and your father is _not_ going to stop me.”

 

“I- Christ, _fine,_ you win! Just – don’t get the Court involved, I can’t have that on my record, it would look like shit!”

 

“What was that? Did I just completely miss your apology?”

 

“I’m _sorry_ , you can go back to your nasty little boyfriend and do whatever the hell you want! I’ll stop harassing the both of you if you drop the Court thing, okay!”

 

“The fact that you’re begging me to drop it just shows how aware you are of the fact that you’re being a really shitty human being, because you know you’d be the one found guilty.”

 

“Look, Fili. I can’t have this on my record, in my past. I need to be perfect and clean. Bringing this to Court would drag me through the mud, and it would be a long ass process that none of us have time for. You drop the Court threat, I’ll stop giving you and Kili shit. Okay?”

 

Legolas holds his hand out, and even though Fili knows that he should go for true justice, that he should make Legolas finally get in trouble, he know he can’t go through with it. The CA was making him an offer he couldn’t refuse, and he’s more than aware that it’s a one time only deal. And Legolas might be a piece of shit, but Fili knows on good word that Legs’ is true to his promises. So he shakes hands with the devil.

 

“I’m glad you made this decision, Fili. I’ll leave you and Kili alone, and I’ll treat you just like everyone else. For the most part, at least; I can’t have everyone thinking that I suddenly like the two of you. I need to keep up my appearances.”

 

“Fine. But if you pull something like that again, the deal is off. I’ll drag you so far through your metaphorical mud that you’ll drown in it. Understood?”

 

Legolas snorts, even throws in a half impressed smile.

 

“Who would have thought, laid back Fili has some claws. You keep up your end and I’ll keep up mine.”

 

Legolas leaves and Fili heads back to Kili’s room, completely freaked out by how he could potentially find Kili. It wasn’t often that his boyfriend had these breakdowns, but they always had the potential to get worse if Kili didn’t have someone around. He’d get to the point where he couldn’t even do his homework, stopped going to club meetings and curled up in his bed and did nothing for days.

 

When he gets to the room, he opens the door and finds Kili on the floor with his arms wrapped around his trashcan as he heaves up vomit. It happens every time Kili has an anxiety attack. That’s another thing Fili hates. Tears streaking down his face and his hair a mess and just how hard it is to calm him down.

 

“Oh Kee..”

 

Going over to his boyfriend, Fili takes out his hair tie and pulls Kili’s brown locks into a messy knot. A hand rubs gently at his back, trying so hard to be a source of comfort.

 

“It’s going to be okay Kili. I’m here again, and it’s going to be fine.”

 

Kili looks at him with wide eyes, body shaking and chest heaving as he pulls in sharp breaths. There’s panic in his eyes and his hands are white from clenching onto the small trashcan.

 

“Breathe with me, okay? Just focus on what I’m saying. Breathe in…. and out… in, out. Can you do that? Breathe nice, slow, and steady, calm and easy. Focus on my hand rubbing your back.”

 

His voice stays smooth and soft, and he alternates between talking and breathing in and out with Kili. It takes a bit, but eventually Kili manages to calm down enough to stop hyperventilating. Hands move to help Kili off the floor; he grabs his toothbrush and guides his boyfriend into the bathroom so he can brush his teeth.

 

“Do you want to take a shower?” He asks quietly.

 

Kili nods his head yes, slowly fumbles around to put some toothpaste onto the brush.

 

“I’m going to go and grab your stuff for you, okay? I’ll throw away the bag in your trashcan, and then I’ll be right here.”

 

He doesn’t get a reply this time, but Fili takes it that Kili is okay with it. He’s back in less than five minutes, one of the knitted sweaters Kili had stolen from him in hand along with a clean pair of sweats and boxers.

 

By this time, Kili is done brushing his teeth and is staring into the mirror, eyes wide and sad. He looks dazed and lost, mind stuck in a dark place that eats him alive. Kili always looks like that after an attack, and Fili wants nothing more than to be able to take it all away. But he can’t.

 

“Back.”

 

“Stay?”

 

“Sure.”

 

Fili tries his best to smile, but it comes out looking sad more than anything. Kili looks away, grabs his things from Fili’s hands and stares down at the floor as he walks away to a shower stall. The water turns on, curls of hot steam swirling in the air. Pressing his back against the wall, Fili slides down until he’s sitting on the floor, hands rubbing at his face because a simple task had turned into such a screwed up situation, one that he hadn’t meant to cause at all. Now Kili was sad and aching in a shower stall, and he’s out here sitting on the bathroom floor waiting because he doesn’t know what else he can do.

 

* * *

 

 

Once Kili is showered and dressed, they make their way back silently to his room. He wants to say something, but doesn’t know what. There’s no way to convey what he’s feeling, guilty for making Kili so upset, completely raw and wrecked because he hates seeing him sad and in pain. So he follows Kili’s lead.

 

His boyfriend picks up his planner and a pen, crawls into his bed and beckons for Fili to come and join him. He doesn’t hesitate, crawls into the bed and wraps his arms around Kili.

 

“I’m sorry Kee.”

 

“No I’m sorry… I.. you’re right. You’re always right. I keep fucking up this whole thing because I’m so consumed by schoolwork and grades and clubs and I don’t.. I’m a really shitty boyfriend.”

 

Kili’s looking teary eyed, and it’s the last damn thing that Fili wants right now. If Kili starts crying again he’s going to start crying, and then it will really be a shit show.

 

“You’re not a terrible boyfriend, Kili. You just.. you have to prioritize things, you know? And you… maybe you should think about seeing a counselor.”

 

Kili goes tense in his arms, and Fili knows that maybe it had been a little to soon to mention the idea, but Kili.. Fili doesn’t know how else to put it but saying that his boyfriend is an emotional wreck. Kili is equal parts stressed and sad, obsessing over grades and then shirking off his studies. It’s a pattern that Fili is familiar with, and up until now, they haven’t really talked about it. Christ, he just wants his boyfriend to be happy and healthy, that’s the only thing he wants for him.

 

“I don’t need to see a counselor. “

 

“Kili, this isn’t healthy. You.. you go through this cycle almost every other month and it’s hurting you so god damn much. Don’t you want to be happy Kee? This just.. I can’t keep watching you hurt this much.”

 

He’s just speaking the truth, letting all the words that he had been thinking spill out into the air. Because Kili needs to hear the reality, he needs to get some help, to figure out how to cope better. He knows that he’s opening a can of worms; knows that Kili is going to be pissy and upset with him, but he’s willing to bare that burden if it means he can help his boyfriend.

“I don’t _need_ any help. I’m _fine._ ”

 

“You’re not fine, Kili! And you don’t have to do everything on your own! There are so many people who are willing to support you!”

 

“I’m not going to counseling, okay?! I’ll start prioritizing better, I’ll schedule in free time and I’ll be better, I promise! Please just.. just don’t tell me to go to counseling.”

 

How he wants to keep pushing, to get Kili to see that counseling isn’t bad and that it won’t make him weak, that it can help him and make him feel better. But he knows if he keeps at it right now it’s only going to end in fighting and the great likelihood that Kili will be a little brat and not schedule free time. Just to be a spiteful little bastard. So he lets it go, decides to take what he can get.

 

“Okay, fine. Lets just look over your schedule and move things around,” Fili sighs.

 

It’s just a bandaid on a gaping wound, he’s more than aware of that, and at some point it’s going to get infected. Bandaids won’t keep working, and there’s going to be fallout and more stress, pain, and sadness. But he’ll try to take it all in stride because he just wants Kili to be happy. He feels like he’s just being an enabler, but he doesn’t know what the hell else to do right now.

 

They go through the schedule and create free time for Kili to relax, as well as times set aside to hang out with friends and a date night for him and Fili. It’s something, and Fili hopes to god that it’ll be enough to keep Kili in a healthy state of mind

 

* * *

Kili decides to not go to his classes that day, since he only has two anyways and he hasn’t missed any yet. Which is absolutely crazy and Fili is pretty sure that his boyfriend had been taken over by an alien, but hey, he wasn’t exactly willing to question it.

 

Fili ends up shooting off a text to Bofur asking him to pick them up some breakfast sandwiches at one of the local coffee shops. It takes a bit of negotiation and an owed favor, but he gets Bofur to agree to bring sandwiches and coffee for them.

 

He enters the room with arms full to find that Fili and Kili are snuggled up and cuddling as they binge watch Netflix together. Bofur is pretty sure that the world has ended because the time before Kili’s classes was always dedicated to studying and making notes for all of his readings.

 

“Do my eyes deceive me? Could it be? No textbooks, highlighters or notebooks? No post it notes and crazed expressions? You’re.. you’re watching Netflix?”

 

Kili throws a pillow at his roommate, huffs something about how he hates everyone and to hand over the coffee. He doesn’t say anything else for a few minutes, and when he does, it comes out pretty meek.

 

“Am I really that bad?”

 

Both Fili and Bofur freeze, brows raised and they make eye contact as they both silently freak out about what they should say.

 

“I.. You’re just really dedicated to your studies!”

 

“Totally, you just, you know, super care about your grades.”

 

Kili looks back and forth between the two, slumps down into his pillows and huffs, staring at the tv. They both groan.

 

“Kili, you just… you do way to much homework and freak out about dumb stuff. And you cancel plans with people so you can reorganize your class notes. That’s just.. it’s not necessary, you know?” Bofur says.

 

“Okay, fine, I get it! I’m crazy!”

 

“Have you thought about maybe going to see a counse-“

 

“I think we should watch a funny show! Who wants to pick!” Fili interrupts loudly, trying desperately to end the conversation. It’s pretty obvious what he’s trying to do, but Kili is more than willing to go along with it.

 

“ How I met your mother?” Kili puts forth.

 

He queues it up and curls himself back around Kili, enjoying the warmth and the cuddles because it had been some time since they’d been able to just laze about together. Things have been shitty and ridiculous this morning, but right now he’s comfortable and warm, and he has Kili beside him.

 

“I love you.”

 

Fili murmurs the words in his boyfriend’s ear, just completely consumed with the amount of feelings and emotions he has for Kili. The stress and sadness, the happiness and the laughter, the absolute adoration that he has, all of it eats him up and devours him whole.

 

“Love you too,” Kili smiles, presses him self close and tangles his fingers with Fili’s.

 

“And I’m sorry about earlier, I just.. I know I need to work on it, I do. And I’m lucky I have you because you just care so damn much. So thank you for that, for sticking around even when I’m being difficult and let my anxiety control me and I get just so stupidly consumed. But I’m going to be better. For you and for myself.”

 

“I know you are. And I know you can get in a better place Kee, I know you can learn to balance things out. You can do anything you put your mind to, you’re so damn smart and strong-willed. Which is half the reason why I love you so much.”

 

“And what’s the other half, hm?”

 

“Your gorgeous, hot body of course.”

 

He gets a light punch to the arm, but Kili is smiling and rubbing his nose against Fili’s cheek. Light kiss is placed on his forehead, which morphs into an actual soft kiss, but Bofur is more than ready to interrupt and start making gagging noises in their general direction.

 

“God, you two are disgusting.”

 

“Love you too, Bo.”

**TBC**

* * *

 

Thanks for reading everyone! Let me know what you think! And if you feel like it, you can stop by my tumblr, letterstoshakespear! :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! 
> 
> Thank you so, so much for being patient with me! I know I took foreverrrrrr to update this! But hey, I finally did it! :*) 
> 
> Thanks for coming back to read more, and I hope you enjoy this update! 
> 
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* * *

 

Kili is trying out this whole free time thing, but it’s _hard_. Much harder than he ever would have expected it to be. The thought of not doing something ‘productive’ per say, completely escapes him. It’s difficult to take the time to spend an hour reading a book for pleasure, or screwing around with circuit boards just for fun. It’s easier when it’s time that he’s taking out for Fili or his friends. He can handle that, because he’s knows that they’re important to him.

 

He loves playing video games with Gimli and Bard, going on hikes with Fili and letting the blond take a thousand pictures as they go. That camera is so present that sometimes he thinks he’s the third partner in the relationship. It’s fun, being with them, but it’s still difficult. Sometimes his gut will clench at the thought of all the things he is putting off, smile vanishing from his face as he mentally goes through the checklist that he has in his planner.

 

Sometimes he finds himself pulling out his phone, checking the time every few minutes so he can leave exactly on the dot of his established time. The sooner he can get away, the sooner he can start working on his calculus homework, or maybe organizing his notes for organic chemistry. It doesn’t escape Fili or his friends, but at least he’s trying to be better, he’s trying to cope with the anxiety that keeps controlling his life.

 

He spends less time doing work, and he still manages to get A’s on most of his assignments. Granted, a B here and there wasn’t a big deal, but it added up over time if he wasn’t careful. It wasn’t his fault that his he had to get good grades if he wanted to get into a good grad school. The thought of getting denied to a school because his grades weren’t good enough makes his mouth feel dry and his head pulse. It’s something he tries desperately not to dwell on.

 

But this weekend there’s a party at the Ski House, one in which Fili has been invited to, so by definition Kili is invited as well. House parties had never been all that appealing to him when it came down to it. Why would he want to go somewhere that included getting drunk with a bunch of people that he didn’t know, getting hit on by people he didn’t know, and potentially face getting busted by the cops? There’s a multitude of other reasons as to why he’s not a fan of the concept, but for some reason, Fili is.

 

His boyfriend adores interacting with others, loves drinking and smoking a bowl with friends and dancing in too hot crowds with a bunch of strangers. Fili loves people, loves talking to them and interacting with them. Meanwhile Kili can barely stand the sound of drunken girls laughing too loud.

 

So no, he does not want to go to the party, but Fili was going, as well as Bofur, Nori, Ori, Gimli, and Eowyn. If he wanted to spend time with his boyfriend and friends, he’d have to go. And if they were all going, it couldn’t really be all that bad, could it?

 

That’s how he finds himself in Fili’s room, watching the blond pick through his jeans and multiple sweaters before he finally settles on something that he wants to wear. It’s a pair of black skin-tight capri jeans with a white shirt and a flannel. Blond hair is pulled back in a loose braid; some black boat shoes put on his feet, and Fili is ready to go.

 

Meanwhile he’s just wearing a burgundy Henley and some jeans, looking on in awe as his boyfriend completes his look. It’s astounding, how easily Fili falls into a stereotype. It’s amusing and adorable all at the same time.

 

“You’re amazing,” Kili smiles, sprawled out on the bed as Fili turns around. Dimples form and eyes crinkle, a little chuckle escaping his lips as he places a soft kiss on Kili’s cheek. Ori looks between the two, squinting as he finally settles on Kili.

 

“Congratulations, Fili, you’re amazing for being able to put on your clothes. Well done.”

 

“Shutup, Ori.”

 

Fili gives him a ‘be nice’ look, but it doesn’t stop him from sticking his tongue out at Ori. He pulls Fili down to sit on the bed, rests his head on his lap and watches as Ori rolls his eyes, leaning against his bed with his legs crossed.

 

“Just because you don’t see how amazing Fili is doesn’t mean you have to be a snarky little shit.”

 

“Oh goodness, what is it this time? The way the light makes his hair shine? His twinkling blue eyes?”

 

Ori swoons, eyes fluttering as he collapses onto the bed, a hand placed over his heart like his chest is aching. Fili is the one to throw a pillow at his head. A half smile forms on Kili’s face, watching as Ori instantly shoots up and grabs the pillow as his own weapon, smacking Fili across the chest. It’s only a moment later that Kili becomes the next victim of the attack, the brunet attempting to squirm away as he faces the brunt of the onslaught.

 

His face hurts from how hard he’s smiling, body twisting and turning as the pillow smacks against him again, Fili’s probing fingers joining in to start tickling his sides. It’s only a matter of time before shrieking laughter starts up, chest going tight as he tries to suck in air through all of the laughter.

 

“You win, you win!” He half squeals the words as he tries to curl his body up, but he’s having a hard time pushing Fili’s light fingers away from him with Ori still attacking with the pillow, cackling with glee.

 

“M-mercy!”

 

“Oh I don’t know if you deserve mercy,” Fili chuckles, moving towards his undefended stomach. More shrieks of laughter and there are tears pouring out of the corners of his eyes, stomach sore and tense.

 

“What do you think Ori, should we let him go?”

 

Hands stop tickling, arms instead moving to wrap around his torso and haul him up into Fili’s lap; his brown hair a mess and cheeks flushed a bright red color. Ori looks on with bright eyes, taps the pillow gently against Kili’s face before he tosses it back onto the bed.

 

“Yeah, I think he’s had enough torture for now.”

 

Ori’s words are accompanied with Fili placing a light kiss to the corner of his jaw, nose moving to snuffle against his neck. The scratchy feeling of facial hair against sensitive skin is enough to make him shiver, which only adds to the smile on his face. Ori taps away at the screen of his phone as Fili and Kili curl up against each other on the bed, fingers carding through the now tangled tresses of Kili’s hair. If anything Fili is only making the knots worse, but he doesn’t really mind if it means that the blond is happy.

 

“When are the others showing up?” Fili breaks the silence, looking up at Ori while his fingers continue to card away. It would be more than easy for Kili to fall asleep like this.

 

“Bofur and Nori in five, Gimli and Eowyn in ten. Do you two have your shit together?”

 

“Mhm. Our beer is in my bag,” Fili replies.

 

“Alright good. And you’re both going to wear appropriate shoes in case we have to run for our lives from the police? Well I suppose I should be talking to you, Fili, since Kili would probably die before he got a diversion. “

 

If he weren’t feeling so relaxed, he’d probably have a biting remark to make, but as it is he would rather be laying down with Fili massaging his scalp.

 

“My shoes are good, Ori, don’t worry about it. Besides, all I have to do is trip Kili so they catch him first. I’ll be golden.”

 

It takes a moment for him to catch on to what exactly the blond has said, but once he does, he doesn’t hesitate to reach up and pinch Fili’s side, his boyfriend laughing and yelping all at the same time.

 

“See if you get any this week,” he grumbled.

 

“I’d give you two days before you caved in. I’m irresistible to you.”

 

“And I think someone needs an ego check, Fee.”

 

Kili smiles sweetly at his boyfriend, more than willing to make Fili absolutely grovel before he allows him to attempt anything sexual. The blond must catch the gleam in Kili’s eyes, arms wrapping around him in a tight hug and lips pressing against his hair.

 

“I mean that I love you and that our relationship means more than sex. I mean, who can resist your cuddles? So you can withhold from me, I’ll survive.”

 

Ori takes this as his moment to interrupt, eyes wide and cheeks pale. He needs to put in his two cents if he wants to keep his sanity.

 

“Please do _not_ follow through with that idea? There is only so many times you can interrupt ‘alone time’ unknowingly before you’re scarred. The two of you just keep doing your sex thing.”

 

“Aw, we’re Ori approved!” Fili cheers, arms pumping into the air whilst Kili just rolls his eyes at his boyfriend’s antics. After a moment or two he rolls off of the bed and ruffles around in Fili’s bag, grabbing himself a beer and one for Fili as well. Everyone seems to be taking longer than what they said, so why not start getting a buzz on?

 

Ori and Fili spend the time waiting talking about the latest gossip, Fili’s eyes lighting up when he hears that Aragorn and Arwyn are _finally_ together. Kili is impartial to the conversation, instead watching the way that Fili’s lips move, forming words with each contraction of muscle. He likes the way that Fili’s nose slopes down, how is eyelashes gleam in the light and his blue eyes glow. More than anything he wants to figure out the bits and pieces that make up the equation to Fili’s beauty.

 

Sometimes he wishes that he could quantify what makes Fili so beautiful and amazing to him; he wants to understand why sometimes, when he looks at Fili, his chest will start to ache and his lungs will constrict. He’s never quite able to get rid of that little voice in his head, the one that whispers he will never be good enough for Fili. He will never deserve him.

 

Melancholy thoughts are interrupted by the appearance of their friends, Bofur, Nori, Gimli, and Eowyn walking through the door. He plasters a smile on his face and greets them all like he would normally.

 

But there’s still a dull ache in his chest, accompanied by that soft little voice of doubt.

 

* * *

 

 

Kili feels like a lightweight. He’s two shots of tequila and five beers into the night, his head is spinning, limbs uncoordinated and body thrumming with energy. He feels hot all over and he has no idea where he is in this house, his friends have disappeared and Fili is nowhere to be seen. He doesn’t remember how they got separated, but he’s in a tightly packed room with thrumming bass, a beer in his hand that’s a completely different brand than what he came with.

 

At some point the swirling need to find Fili had disappeared, head too fuzzy and body filled with too much energy to crane his neck to search for familiar golden hair. Instead he finds himself in the middle of the crowd of bodies, dancing, or grinding, more like, with a girl he has never even seen before.

 

The air is filled with shouting voices and too loud music, strong smells of clashing perfume, cologne and sweat. The world twists and spins, his body moves, and there’s lips grazing across his own, a hand pulling him through the crowd, a smooth red mane of hair and green eyes that pull him along into a quieter part of the house.

 

“Want to get out of here?”

 

He’s hit with a sultry smile, blood singing through his veins, but he can’t, he’s not supposed to be here, he’s lost in this crowd of people, lost inside of himself and he’s not even sure of what he’s doing anymore.

 

“I n-no, I came with someone else, I’m.. I’m _here_ with someone else.”

 

“You sure? It seems like who ever came with you hasn’t been keeping a good eye on you. It’ll only be one night of fun.”

 

Her hand is on his arm and everything is unfocused and confused, and he knows what he wants to say, but he can’t get the words out. His tongue feels thick and swollen, a clumsy hindrance in his mouth. Kili never does get the chance to say anything.

 

Bofur comes up beside him, eyes wide and a hand wrapping around his arm. Even with his current level of intoxication, Kili knows that the look on Bofur’s face doesn’t bode well for him.

 

“Kili. We need to leave.”

 

“I – what?”

 

“We need to leave. And you? Take your little mitts off of him, you hear? He’s taken.”

 

The girl with the read hair pulls her hand away, raising them a little in the air. Soft smile graces her lips, green eyes flashing as she takes a step back.

 

“Duly noted. See you around, Kili.”

 

She disappears into the crowd.

 

Bofur doesn’t hesitate to drag him out of the house, hand firmly attached to his arm as he leads Kili down the road a ways. He’s slightly surprised to see that Ori is pacing back and forth under a streetlight, hissing into his phone.

 

He feels like he’s missing something important, but his eyes keep looking up at the stars in the sky, marveling at how nice they look. Maybe the sky feels like velvet and the stars are sharp and cold like uncut diamonds.

 

Ori jabs at his phone, stomps towards Kili with a less than pleased look on his face. He doesn’t look rageful, at least, just extremely annoyed. He’d take that over a pissy Ori any day.

 

“You need to go back to the dorm and fix this right now, Kili!”

 

“I- what? Fix what? “

 

Everything is all jumbled up in his skull, and he’s trying desperately to sort through the night but there are voids in his memory, gaps of time that just aren’t present. Even the girl with the red hair seems hazy now, a far away dream that hadn’t really happened to him but someone else.

 

“Fili is _pissed_. And I mean pissed, Kili. I’m guessing you’re beyond buzzed right now, considering you can’t even stand, and I don’t know if that should even be an excuse as to what you did, but I can understand we do dumb things when we’re drunk. That being said, I think-“

 

“Wait. Uhm…. What? What happened?”

 

Ori groans, throws his hands up into the air and motions to Bofur.

 

“You deal with him, I can’t handle drunk Kili.”

 

“That red-headed girl you were dancing with? She was getting awfully friendly with you, and you didn’t really try to stop her, Kili. She was up in your shit, she kissed you a bit, and then you let her drag you away. Fili saw it and, of course, was extremely upset by this, and left. Which is why I grabbed you and why Ori is out here arguing with Fili over the phone, trying to make a case for you.”

 

Everything is so sluggish and confusing, but there are little blips of images feeding through his brain, the feel of thin fingers on his waist and color stained lips pressing against the corner of his mouth. His stomach clenches in knots, and he’s not sure if it’s because he feels sick over hurting Fili or because of the alcohol.

 

All he knows is that it feels like his thoughts and mind have reached crystalized clarity, waves of guilt and self-hatred crashing down on him in tidal waves. _Fili_. How could he be so _stupid_? How could he, drunk or not, allow himself to do something so completely idiotic? To jeopardize his relationship and hurt the person that meant the most to him?

 

His mouth tastes like cherries.

 

“Fuck.”

 

He pukes, empties his stomach out on the ground as Ori and Bofur hold him up, trying to talk him through it, but nothing registers in his head but the sound of his retching. Ori hands him a piece of gum once he’s done.

 

He’s still very, very drunk, but all he can think about now is how upset Fili must be, how betrayed and hurt he must feel after seeing Kili with that girl. He had no idea what the hell he was doing anymore, no idea of what was going on, just that his self destructive ways were making themselves known again.

 

“I need to go back and talk to him, I need to apologize I – shit, I fucked up so bad, I don’t even know what I did I- was it just mostly dancing? Did I make out with her or anything? Please tell me I didn’t try to do anything else with her, I can’t even-“

 

Bofur places his hands on either side of Kili’s face, fingers pressing softly against his cheeks. His eyes are dark with shadows, full of worry and seriousness.

 

“As far as I know, you danced with her, and you kissed a little bit. Not a make out, but there was definitely a bit of spit swap if you get my drift.”

 

Ori doesn’t hesitate to slap Bofur upside the back of his head, glaring at his explanation.

 

“You didn’t do anything that isn’t fixable, okay? It’s going to take a fair bit of groveling, cuddling, and doing whatever he wants to fix this, but it will be fixed. You made a dumb, drunk mistake. All you have to do is tell him the truth, Kili. He’ll respect that.”

 

“I just.. I don’t know how this happened.. I didn’t – I don’t even know how I got separated from everyone, or where I got more drinks, or how any of this even happened. How did this happen?”

 

He’s confused and feels sick and his head is spinning, and all he wants is Fili but he’s screwed that up, that’s for certain. Everything keeps slipping away in his head, a confused jumbled mess. And when he tries to walk away, his legs won’t cooperate, stumbling and catching to make him fall forward. Bofur and Ori catch him at the last minute, concerned gazes connecting before they help Kili to steady himself.

 

“Do you know how much he drank Bo?” Ori asks, hand curling up behind Kili’s back as they start to make their way back to the dorm. Kili doesn’t even comprehend the question that’s directed to his room mate, too lost in his own head, swirl of confusion and blank spots of memory taking over.

 

“He had a fair amount, but I didn’t think enough to get like this.”

 

“Think he was given something and doesn’t remember?”

 

“I have no idea Ori, your guess is as good as mine,” Bofur sighs, just trying to figure out how the night had turned into this. He’d left Fili and Kili alone maybe a half hour in, and hadn’t seen his roommate again until after Fili had exchanged a clipped conversation with him, practically storming out of the house.

 

Now their normally fifteen minute walk back to campus takes double that time, not to mention getting into the building past the CA on duty is a bit of a treat, considering Kili can barely stand on his own. Ori provides a distraction and Bofur drags Kili to the elevator.

 

It’s not until they’re heading to their room that Kili says anything again, tugging himself clumsily away from Bofur.

 

“I n-need Fili, I have to – I need to apologize, I need to –“

 

“Kili, I think it’d be better if you got some sleep, okay? “ Bofur soothes, moving hesitantly towards his agitated friend.

 

“B-but he’s got to be so angry with me, I need to see him, please let me see him?”

 

Kili is looking at him with big brown eyes, hair tangled and body shaking. But he can’t even stand on his own, has to press up against the wall just so he can manage on his own. It’s clear that there is something very wrong with his roommate.

 

“You need to lay down, Kili. I think you were drugged or.. or something, because this isn’t normal for you, not at all. You can see Fili tomorrow.”

 

Kili doesn’t like the sound of this, tries to walk away only to take a single step and collapse on the floor. It’s only a matter of time before someone comes out to go to the bathroom and sees them, which will more than likely lead to a call to public safety or a CA being brought upstairs.

 

Bofur doesn’t bother to help Kili to stand up and walk. Instead he crouches down and hoists Kili up, grunting as he lugs the brunet back to their room. Luck is on their side, because no one feels the need to go out into the hallway.

 

Setting Kili down on his bed, Bofur has a single moment to breathe before there’s a knock on his door. He only opens it up a smidge at first, unsure of who might be at the door. It’s only Ori.

 

“How is he?”

 

“A mess. He can’t even hold himself up, let alone walk. I think you’re right; someone must have slipped him something. That redhead, I bet. We must have got to him right before whatever it was started really kicking in, Ori. He’s passed out already.”

 

Ori pushes his way into the room, marching over to Kili’s bed as lines of worry crease his face. Kili looks pale, feels cold and clammy and his eyes move restlessly beneath closed lids.

 

“Make sure you watch him, okay? I’m going to head back to my room and talk to Fili, calm him down a bit. Kili can come over and talk to him tomorrow. It’s a shit storm, to say the least, but things will work out in the end, I’m sure of it.”

 

“Alright, that sounds good to me. Just… make sure he knows that this isn’t entirely Kili’s fault?”

 

“Of course. I’ll talk to you in the morning. Night, Bo.”

 

“Night Ori.”

 

* * *

 

When Kili wakes the next morning, his head feels like cotton. Eyes crack open only for the world to start spinning before him, head pounding and stomach queasy. At least he doesn’t feel like he’s going to vomit.

 

It takes long minutes for him to be able to sift through his memories of the other night, chest clenching tight when he realizes that he can barely remember a single god damn thing; just bright red hair and Bofur saying that Fili was pissed at him. But he can’t remember what had happened, the things he does remember a jumbled mess.

 

It’s the hazy memory of dancing and an unfamiliar pair of lips that jolts him up in bed, his hair a snarled mess and his brown eyes ringed red and raw. Bofur is sitting calmly on his own bed, pausing Netflix before he looks over at him.

 

“Morning, sleeping beauty.”

 

“What did I do? I can’t.. I don’t remember what I did, I can barely remember anything, Bo, and just that Fili’s mad at me and I- what did I do?”

 

Brown eyes well with tears, body shaking because he doesn’t know what he has done, only that something is wrong and he feels like shit. Bofur is out of his bed in moments, hopping up beside Kili and giving him a tense look.

 

“There was a girl. She was tall, with red hair. You were dancing quite ah.. you didn’t seem to have too many boundaries to say the least. You both started kissing each other, nothing hardcore, but Fili saw it all and got pissed, obviously.”

 

Kili feels like he’s going to be sick again, trying so hard to remember her face, but all he can bring up is dancing and the feeling of lips against his own. He feels like he’s going to be sick to his stomach.

 

“I- oh my god. He’s going to hate, me, he probably already does hate me! I kissed someone else and I – he’s totally going to break up with me, he’s already so tired of my shit, there’s no way he’s going to want to stay with me now, what am I supposed to do!?”

 

Bofur’s hands dance around Kili’s body, trying to figure out how to give his best friend comfort, but he has no idea of how to do that. Kili’s crying and breathing heavy and it’s only a matter of time before this turns into an all out panic attack.

 

“Kili, you need to calm down okay? Fili’s pissed, yes, and rightfully so, but it’s not that simple. You made a mistake. People do dumb, stupid things when they drink, and you were certainly drunk.”

 

“That’s not a good reason! I – he- I can’t lose him Bo, I can’t. And I don’t- why would I do that? I don’t even know why I would do that! Why am I so _stupid?_ I’m so stupid Bo, I’m so fucking stupid!”

 

“Do you remember anything from last night Kili, anything at all? You said something about drinking a beer that wasn’t yours. Did that redhead give it to you?”

 

“I- what? I don’t know? I – I remember losing Fili I think, I was wandering around the house, and this guy.. he handed me a beer and I didn’t even think twice about it, I just took it because I was looking for Fili and then I drank some maybe? I don’t know Bo, it’s all twisted up in my head.”

 

His roommate doesn’t say anything for a few moments, articulating his thoughts before he goes to speak to Kili. The brunet is falling apart fast before his eyes, tears streaming and hands shaking. Bofur doesn’t hesitate to take them into his own, squeezing gently as he begins to talk.

 

“Ori and I think you might have been slipped something last night, Kili. I know you’re a bit of a lightweight, but how you were last night and the way you can’t remember anything today.. It’s the only thing that makes senses. I _know_ you, Kili, and you would never just let someone kiss you like that, not in your right mind. “

 

“It doesn’t matter, that doesn’t change anything, it- it-“

 

“Of course it changes things! Kili, you were drugged! And I know Fili is pissed, of course he is, and he might be mad for a little while, but he’s going to forgive you! Ori has been talking to him Kili, and he’s not going to break up with you.”

 

Tears still seep out of red-rimmed eyes, but they are wide and slightly hopeful now, harsh panic having slipped away at Bofur’s words.

 

“H-he said that? You’re positive that’s what he said?”

 

“I wouldn’t lie to you Kili. Not about this. So how about you take a shower and clean up a bit, and I’ll let Fili know that you’ll be coming over to talk to him in a little bit.”

 

“Yeah okay.. I-I’ll go clean up.”

 

Bofur is on his phone as soon as Kili is out of the room.

* * *

 

Kili feels like his insides are alive, twisting and churning, fighting for a way to see the world outside of him self. His head pounds in time with the thump of his heart, harsh and fast. He’s dressed in sweats and a loose sweatshirt, eyes pulsing and burning out of his skull, and he just wants to apologize to his boyfriend and curl up in bed next to him.

 

He has a feeling that things aren’t going to work out that way.

 

Taking a deep, steadying breath, a loose fist knocks softly against the door, teeth biting the soft skin of his lips as he waits. The door opens with a hesitant click, tired blue eyes looking directly into his bloodshot ones. Fili doesn’t say anything to him, leaving the door open as he walks further into his room. There’s an episode of Criminal Minds queued up on Netflix, the screen paused on Prentiss’ face.

 

Kili doesn’t know what he’s supposed to say, what he’s supposed to do. All he knows is that Fili will no longer meet his gaze, eyes trained on his hands as he climbs back into his bed. For a moment he stands there, taking in the sloppily braided hair and the swollen look of Fili’s eyes. He’s the one that put that look on Fili’s face.

 

Grabbing the chair to Ori’s desk, Kili drags it over, placing it right in front of where Fili sits. Neither one of them speaks for long minutes, silence being their solemn companion as they traverse through the mess of thoughts in their skulls.

 

“I’m sorry. I know.. I know that probably doesn’t mean much, but I am. I didn’t – I didn’t know what I was doing Fee. I swear to god, I was trashed and – and I’m so god damn sorry, I’m so sorry.”

 

His chest feels so tight that he’s not sure if he’ll be able to ever breathe the same way again. It _hurts_ , like his veins are clotting with the bittersweet tang of disappointment and anger. He doesn’t know what to do.

 

“Ori and Bo say they think you were roofied,” Fili murmurs.

 

“I don’t- I should have known better, I should have stopped, even if I was I – it doesn’t change anything.”

 

“Yeah, it kind of does change things Kili.”

 

Paint stained fingers rub gently at the skin of Fili’s temples, little wisps of golden hair twisting up in little swirls. Fili doesn’t look at him, keeps his eyes closed as lips part to speak.

 

“I know you didn’t do it on purpose, Kili. You’re not like that, I know you’re not but it just.. it hurts. It hurt seeing you dance with her like that when you won’t with me, and that sounds really terrible and selfish considering, but it’s how I feel. I hate that you didn’t stop her from kissing you, and it fucking hurts, but I get it. You were drunk and drugged. It’s fine. I’m just.. upset. And I’m dealing.”

 

Kili doesn’t say anything. Words can’t possibly encapsulate the emotions what he is feeling, the air of distress and pain that drifts through the room. It’s all a discordant symphony of clashing thoughts and feelings, the ache to be forgive and the knowledge that though Fili says that it’s fine, it’s not.

 

“Did you think things were fine before you found out I was ‘drugged’? Or are you just using it as a rationalization to be able to forgive me.”

 

Hiss of air escapes Fili’s clenched teeth as blue eyes snap open, a stark sizzling anger very present within their depths. But Kili pushes because that’s what he does.

 

“If I’d just been drunk this would be a totally different story. It-“

 

“Does it matter, Kili? Do you _want_ me to be pissed off at you?”

 

“No, I’m just-“

 

“Just what? Trying to push the issue? Trying to make me be angry with you!? Because I don’t _want_ to be angry Kili, I don’t have it in me to go around and be angry at the world! So I’m fucking sorry if I’m willing to try and be understanding and forgiving even though I’ve been up all fucking night crying because you’re an idiot who doesn’t know how to watch his drink!”

 

He was asking for it, he knows that he was, but he still feels like the air has been punched from his lungs. Fili stares at him with bright angry eyes, tears welled up in the corners that threaten to spill over at any moment.

 

“Fee-“

 

“Can we please just.. can we not fight? I hate fighting with you Kili, and I just can’t right now.”

 

“I don’t want to fight either, but we need to talk about this.”

 

“You got drunk, and drugged, and you danced with her and you kissed her. It’s.. I know you didn’t do it on purpose, Kili. People do shit they would never do when they’re drunk, and I’m fine with it, okay? I’m nowhere near happy about it, but It’s not the end of the world.”

 

“Then why does it feel like you’re still mad at me?”

 

Fili doesn’t say anything. His chest expands with a sigh, air ghosting out soft and slow. Kili just wants to go back to bed.

 

“I’m not mad at you specifically Kili. I’m mad at the situation. Just please trust me when I say that it’s going to be fine? We’ll work through it and we’ll be okay.”

 

It still feels like there’s something caught in his throat.

 

“Is it okay if I hold you?”

 

Fili seems to ponder him for a moment, short nails scratching at the scruff on his jaw. It doesn’t take long for him to nod his head yes. Putting Ori’s chair back, Kili hops up on to the bed beside Fili, arms wrapping hesitantly around his body.

 

Almost instantly, Fili’s body melts against his own, head resting on his shoulder and fingers curling into the fabric of his clothing.

 

They’re not perfect right now, but as always, they’ll carry on.

 

* * *

Thanks again for reading everyone! Comments and Kudos are always appreciated :) If you'd like, come visit me on tumblr! I have the same username as on here :)

Cheers!

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I've been oddly inspired to work on this fic a lot recently, so I have another chapter done! Woo yay! 
> 
> It's a little shorter than usual though, because I don't want to move onto the next part of the story or this chapter would have been waaay longer. So yeah! 
> 
> Comments and Kudos are always appreciated, and I hope you enjoy! :)

* * *

Fili said that everything would be okay, that he wasn’t mad and that they would work through it. But Kili knows it’s a lie, and the next week more than proves it. He knows it’s a lie in the way Fili doesn’t even try to see him, knows it’s a lie when he won’t spend the night, or they way he won’t kiss him, the tightness in his shoulders when he looks at Kili.

 

He tries apologizing over and over, but the blond always cuts him off, tells him to stop because it’s okay. Kili doesn’t know how to make it better, and he certainly has no idea how he’s supposed to get Fili explain what he wants from him. He knows more than anyone that when Fili is faced with conflict or anger, his most likely course of action is to shut who ever it is that caused it out.

 

It’s dreadful, how boring and bland the days seem without Fili there to cheer him up or give him hugs. He misses the smell of oil paints, the way Fili always ends up getting it smeared all over himself when he’s working on a project. Hell, he even misses going on walks with that _stupid_ camera always out, taking picture after picture of him even though Fili’s supposed to be doing something actually productive.

 

So he talks to Bofur about it. Because he _knows_ that Bofur talks to Ori all the time, the two being great friends, so if anyone has insight, it’ll be him.

 

“Bo.. how am I supposed to get him to like me again?”

 

His roommate seems surprised by that, looking up from the homework spread across his bed. It looks like he’s relaxed at first, but he can see the tightness in his jaw and the fake cheerfulness plastered across his face.

 

“I don’t know what you mean, Kili. Of course he still likes you, he wouldn’t be with you if he didn’t.”

 

“He’s so mad at me Bo. He says he’s not, that we’re fine, but he doesn’t even want to see me anymore, let alone talk to me. And I’ve tried, but he keeps shutting me out.”

 

Bofur sighs, hand coming up to rub at his face. He drops the cheerfulness, looks at Kili with sad eyes and a tight-lipped expression.

 

“Yeah, he’s still mad. Ori’s been trying to remind him that the entire situation wasn’t honestly your fault, but he keeps leaving the room when he tries to talk about it.”

 

“But we’ve told him over and over again!”

 

“I know that, Kili. But I think there’s maybe more too it than him just being upset over you kissing someone else. I think.. well I think he might be afraid that you’re going to leave him. For that redhead or maybe even someone else.”

 

“I- that’s crazy! I wouldn’t – how could he possibly think that!?”

 

“Probably because you’re both so different. Look, Kili, he’s always been.. god I don’t even know how to explain this.. he’s always though that he’s not good enough for you. He doesn’t talk about it to you of course, but to Ori and I.. well.. he’s afraid, and I quote, ‘that he’s going to realize I’m just an idiot artist that has no idea what the hell I want for my future. I’m stupid and he’s brilliant, and I wouldn’t blame him if he left me.’”

 

There’s a lot of things that Kili wants to say right now, like how Fili is one of the kindest people that he’s ever met, that he doesn’t care if the blond isn’t good at math, he’s brilliant at art, and it doesn’t matter that he isn’t sure about his future, because he _loves_ Fili.

 

“He’s such an _idiot_ , oh my god, how could he honestly think that I’d think that about him!?”

 

“Kee, he’s insecure. And I think that the party really brought that to light for him. He just thinks that you could do better and be with someone who has more in common with you.”

 

“I don’t want someone who has more in common with me…” He groans, flopping down face first into his bed.

 

“Then tell him that. Get Ori to let you into the room so you can lie in wait for him and make him listen to you.”

 

Kili nods his head slowly, mind already leaping to different ideas of what he can do, how he can show Fili that he doesn’t need anyone but him. Pulling a notebook out, he starts jotting down different things that he needs, when he can put his plan into action and whom he can get to help him.

 

“I have an idea. Can you get Ori to stop by? This whole thing isn’t going to work unless he agrees… and will you come to the store with me tomorrow? I’ll need help grabbing things and-“

 

“How about you tell me your plan first, Kili?”

 

Bofur is smiling brightly, already hopping out of his bed and pulling out his phone.

 

“Okay, this is what I’m thinking..”

 

* * *

 

 

Fili has been out _all day_ with Ori, and he’s about ready to kill him. They’d taken Ori’s car, and it was supposed to be a quick shopping trip, but suddenly Ori needed some new pants, he needed more notebooks, then he wanted to go look at the animals in the pet store (granted he enjoyed that part), then he was hungry, and then Fili was ready to commit homicide. But he couldn’t leave because Ori was his ride, and every single person that he texted to ask to come get him told him he was busy. So he was stuck.

 

A one-stop trip turned into a six hour mall stay, and Fili is pretty much ready to throw on a pair of sweats and curl up in his bed, watching Netflix for the rest of the night. Ori drops him off at the dorm and gives some lame story about how he forgot something or another in town and needs to go back. At this point he honestly doesn’t care.

 

He takes the elevator up because he’s been walking around all day and feels particularly lazy at this point, feet sore and slightly aching. A little voice in the back of his head says he should see what Kili’s doing, but at this point he’s freaked out that he’d messed things up by giving him the cold shoulder for a week. He feels like an idiot. He knows he shouldn’t push Kili out, that he should just talk to him, but every time he thinks about it he freezes up in fear.

 

Fumbling around with his keys for a moment, he manages to actually get the door unlocked, throwing his coat onto his side of the floor before he flicks on the light. Bright blue eyes widen in shock, jaw dropping, just trying to take everything in. His room is _covered_ in flowers. On the desk, in front of the tv, on the mini fridges, the shelves and the windowsill.

 

His favorite kinds of candy are laid out on the floor, shaping the words “I’m Sorry” and he is totally _not_ going to get misty eyed, he’s going to be the epitome of masculinity right now, he’s not going cry.

 

He sees the paper that’s on the bed next, grabbing it and alighting on the neat, familiar script of Kili.

 

_Pleurisy Root to cure your heartache._

_Heartsease Pansy’s because you occupy my thoughts._

_Ranunculus because I’m dazzled by your charms._

_Roses because I love you,_

_Forget-me-nots to show my true love,_

_Red Double Pinks to remind you that my love for you is pure and ardent._

Heart clenches in his chest, fingers running across the page and he is totally crying again, teardrops splashing onto the words. The flowers are beautiful; they smell so sweet and are the most be gorgeous colors, reds and blues and pinks. He’s so lost in their beauty; he doesn’t even hear the door open.

 

“Do you like them?”

 

Fili spins around, almost knocking a vase over. Kili’s standing pressed against the door a bit nervously, arms curled around his chest, expression hopeful and worried all at once.

 

“I thought I was supposed to be the romantic one.”

 

Kili gives him a hesitant little smile, but he doesn’t move further into the room. He stays pressed against the door, eyes flickering down to the floor before he looks back up again. When their gazes meet, Kili looks away again.

 

“I love them. Of course I love them, you dork. I don’t even- you didn’t have to do this Kee.”

 

“I did have to. Because I love you, more than anything and I know I’m not exactly good at saying it all the time, but I just- I wanted to show you how much you mean to me. Because you mean.. well you mean everything to me.”

 

“Oh my god you’re making me cry _again_ ,” Fili smiles through the tears, crossing the floor to wrap his arms around Kili. His boyfriend holds him tight, burrowing his face into golden hair. God he _missed_ this, just hugging Kili, being around him.

 

“This is the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for me. I can’t believe how sappy you are, using flower meanings as an apology.”

 

“But you love how sappy I am. And I knew how much you would love it,” Kili breathes the words against him, moving to place a soft kiss on Fili’s lips. It’s sweet and slow, nothing rushed and just so very gentle.

 

“So do you forgive me? Not for just the party but uhm… having Ori keep you out for six hours?”

 

“Oh my _god_!! It took you _six_ hours to set this up? You made me shop with that little monster for six hours!?” Fili groans, slumps against Kili and has the brunet hold him up.

 

“Well it wasn’t supposed to take that long! But I had to go to like, seven different florists to find all the flowers!”

 

Fili shifts and peers up at Kili, eyebrows furrowed.

 

“Do we even have seven florists around us?”

 

“Ten, actually, but I found all the ones that I needed before I had to go to the last three. So I kept having to tell Ori that it was going to take longer so that’s why he dragged you all around the mall.”

 

Kili looks a bit sheepish, but all he has to do is smile up at him to morph his expression into one of happiness.

 

“Can we cuddle? I just want to curl up around you and kiss you for like five hours,” Fili sighs, holding tightly onto Kili.

 

“Of course. But you kind of have to move first,” Kili smiles, running fingers through Fili’s hair.

 

“No. My feet hurt because of you, so now you have to carry me.”

 

Kili’s carrying consists of dragging the blond over to his bed, but Fili doesn’t really seem to mind all that much. He carefully flops down on the bed, grabbing the piece of paper and placing it gently on his set of drawers. Curling up on the bed, he watches Kili search for the controllers for the tv and the x-box, hidden behind a slew of flowers. It doesn’t take long for him to get settled beside Fili.

 

It’s almost as if he is magnetized to Kili, the pull inside his chest and the need to be near him so strong that it makes him physically ache. Staying away for so long seemed stupid now, when he knows that he will always be pulled back to Kili. It’s something that can’t change.

 

Fili sits up slowly, legs folded underneath him as he faces Kili, arms wrapping around him and holding him as close as he can. Hearing Kili’s soft chuckles, the subtle movement of his chest, makes him feel like a new person. This is all he needs.

 

“I missed you,” Kili murmurs, arms curling around the blond. It doesn’t take much effort for him to pull Fili into his lap, pressing soft kisses slowly along his face.

 

“Missed you too.”

 

They never do end up picking out a show. Kili is too consumed with the feeling of Fili in his arms, the softness of his hair and the sweet earthy smell he seems to exude. Why put something on when he can trade lazy open-mouthed kisses, or flutter his eyelashes against his cheeks as butterfly kisses?

 

Nothing else matters but how content he is, how swollen his heart is with love. When he’s around Fili like this, he feels like he can’t breathe. How can he do so anyways, when he’s being kissed so very sweetly? And oh how sweet it is, the way they lick slow and tender, the gentle bites at lips and soft suckle of flesh.

 

They’re curled around one another, pressed in together as close as they can be. Fingers card through hair, graze along hipbones and run along the curves of spine. It’s tender and beautiful, but Kili can’t deny the slow curling heat that’s built up inside of him, lips pulling away from Fili’s when the blond accidently rubs against his erection.

 

“Just ignore it.”

 

Blue eyes are more than a little surprised, looking down before he presses his thigh tighter against the bulge in Kili’s pants.

 

“Why?”

 

“I- you said you wanted to cuddle and kiss. And I d- don’t think that anything more can really be considered cuddling.”

 

Fili hums, reaches his hand down and begins to grab and rub through the fabric of Kili’s jeans. Harsh friction is enough to make him moan outright, lips parting at the pleasure-pain of it all.

 

“Maybe this falls under my definition of cuddling.”

 

“You have an- an odd definition of- fuck!”

 

Fili’s hand burrows beneath the waistband of his jeans and boxer briefs with skilled ease, fingers curling gently around the base of his cock. He practically whimpers at the touch, pushes his hips forward because he wants more.

 

“Maybe. But something tells me you’re enjoying my kind of cuddling,” Fili grins, devilish twinkle lighting up those eyes.

 

It doesn’t take long for them to shimmy out of their jeans and shirts, bodies molding together and cocks bumping together. Kili feels like he’s on fire, heart moving double time but yet he feels so syrupy slow. He has to remind his hormones that this is supposed to be about Fili and not himself.

 

Maneuvering Fili onto his back, Kili climbs over him and brackets him on all fours, smiling down before he places soft kisses all over his face. Fili tries to push him away, laughing at the tickle of Killi’s scruff as it caresses against his face. It cuts off into a moan when he places his lips onto Fili’s collar bones, placing warm, open mouthed kisses onto the skin before he starts to suck and bite.

 

It’s like Fili’s brain is hardwired to his collar-bones, eyes fluttering shut. He knows that he’s going to be sore as hell later, but for the moment, Fili could care less. Everything is soft and sweet, breathy whines and gentle kisses, licks and bites. He could spend hours like this, being worshiped and adored by Kili.

 

“Do you want to do more?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Do you want to top?”

 

“No. Want you inside.”

 

Kili smiles against his lips, presses a kiss to his cheek before he’s gathering the lube and slipping a condom on. Fili feels like he’s on fire, body shuddering when Kili starts to rub at his pucker with a lube-covered finger. Thumb presses gently against the sensitive skin, dragging back and forth until he’s whimpering and the muscle loosens.

 

Pointer finger probes in gently, curling inside and sending sparks of pleasure up his spine. Fili can’t help but to rock down on the single digit, already wanting more. But Kili goes soft and slow, rubs soft and takes long minutes to add another finger, along with more lube. It’s such a smooth glide, muscle loosening even more as the fingers scissor within, stretching and circling teasingly around his prostate.

 

Fingers curl into the sheets, head tossing back and forth when Kili starts to circle smoothly against that electric spot, toes curling and cock bobbing wantonly against his stomach. He can feel little dribbles of precome dripping along the length, falling to matt in the curls of his body hair.

 

“K-Kili I want more, please give me more? I need it so bad, p-please?”

 

“Hush now. I’ll give you more when you’re ready for it.”

 

Body arches as fingers curl roughly against his prostate, low groan escaping as Kili chuckles, his own cock bobbing lewdly as he works his boyfriend open. It’s not long after that, that Kili slowly presses in a third finger, the wet sticky sounds driving Fili insane. He loves the burning stretch, the slick sounds and the feeling of being so full.

 

“Think you’re ready for me?”

 

“Yes! Please just- please just fuck me?”

 

“I’m not fucking you. But I will make love to you.”

 

Fili groans, wiggles his hips and flicks his eyes open to look at the warm brown eyes of his boyfriend. He’s filled with so much love that he feels like he could drown in it, desperate to feel Kili in every single way imaginable.

 

“I love you.”

 

“Love you too, dork.”

 

Fili’s laughing and then he’s not, sound cut off at the feel of Kili finally slipping inside. The blond adores every single thing about this; the tang of sweat, heavy breathing and the stretch of his pucker, feeling the fullness and the lovely comfort of a warm heavy cock inside of him.

 

Kili moves with slow rolling thrusts, pulling himself out almost all the way before he slides back in. It’s a soft teasing drag, too slow but so perfect but not enough and absolutely enough all at once. Breathing hitches and Kili pumps so very carefully, drags himself in and out and holds himself up on his arms because Fili loves to be able to just wrap his arms and his legs around Kili. It makes him feel safe and happy, and though they don’t always have sex like this, it’s his favorite position.

 

All the while Kili presses kisses along his face, against his brow, the tip of his nose and the bow of his lips. Fili attacks his boyfriends lips with open mouthed kisses until the brunet gives in, lowering himself a bit to kiss him better. His thrusts are shallow like this, a tease against his insides that drives him crazy.

 

“Need more,” Fili whispers, fingers to tug gently at Kili’s hair.

 

“You’ll have to let me up, then.”

 

Huffing a bit, he complies, instantly moaning as Kili thrusts deep, little dots bursting in his vision as his cock glides perfectly over his most sensitive area. He keens, wraps, his legs tighter around Kili and begs for more. It’s a slow sweet build up, tingling warmth in the pit of his stomach and he loves the sounds that Kili makes, low grunts and harsh breaths as his sack slaps against Fili’s ass.

 

It’s so much but not enough, his cock dribbling all over, bouncing gently from Kili’s thrusts.

 

“I- Kili please, please I’m so close, I need more please!” His whimpering and begging, nails scratching along his boyfriends back. Kili hisses, thrusts harder and Fili knows that he’s close by the way his hips start to move in uncoordinated thrusts. He manages to hold himself up on one arm, body shaking as he wraps a hand around Fili’s throbbing cock.

 

Fingers strip away at Fili’s hard length, thumb pulling down his foreskin and swirling around the head of his cock in knowledgeable strokes. Breathing picks up and low moans slip out, breath hitching at the perfect tightness, Kili’s cock rubbing against him just the right way and he is _done for_. High moan escapes parted lips, back arches and come spurts, muscles clenching like a vice.

 

Kili thrusts through the blonde’s orgasm, taking advantage of his tightness to fall into his own. Fili’s whimpering from the stimulation, clawing at Kilis back until his love released a low growl, feeling the way his cock twitches inside him to release his load into the condom.

 

The brunet slips out with a slick wet feeling, collapsing against the blond to lick and suck at his panting his mouth, catching his tongue and curling into the lovely cavern of Fili’s mouth. It doesn’t take long for those lips to move to his neck, sucking and nibbling bruises into the skin. He’s well aware that he’ll need to keep his hair down for days to hide them.

 

“Love you Fee.”

 

“Love you too, you great lump. You’re squishing me.”

 

Kili smiles against his neck but rolls off, taking a moment to slip off the condom and throw it in the trash before he’s crawling down between Fili’s legs. The blond lets out a little yelp when Kili parts his legs and pushes a pillow under his butt so that it’s raised up a bit.

 

“Keeeee!”

 

“Shhh, you whiny little brat.”

 

Fili huffs, but he doesn’t protest when Kili raises the blond’s legs onto his shoulders, parting his cheeks to look at his puffy white rim. A possessive, heated look passes across his face for but a moment. He moves on to drag his thumb across the loosened pucker, gentle swirling movements that make Fili squirm and whimper. Kili smirks, rubs more insistently until the blond is begging for more.

 

“Does little Fee want another?” Kili coos.

 

“I’m not little!” He grumbles. That response earns him the removal of the probing finger.

 

“No no no, please put it back!”

 

“Wanna come just like this. Want me to make you fall apart again, just on my fingers?”

 

“Fuck yes! Please I-I need it, need your fingers inside of me, touching me.” His voice is husky and low, brain in a post bliss daze. But his cock is stirring and Kili is slipping his fingers inside of him, not taking as much time to press in after being stretched around that delicious cock.

 

Kili probes insistently, doesn’t bother to tease around his prostate, instead prodding it and rubbing at it until Fili is a shivering begging mess, eyes blown wide and pleasure singing through every nerve of his body. Hips grind down, cock leaks and it’s not long before he’s moaning out another orgasm, untouched cock dribbling out trails of come.

 

His boyfriend doesn’t hesitate to lick his softening cock clean, tongue probing his slit for a last little dribble of come before Fili is practically crying because of the stimulation. Kili nuzzles his flaccid cock before he lays down next to him again, trading lazy kisses for long minutes.

 

Fili is blissed out, hair a mess and sweat cooling against his skin. Kili lays with him for a little longer before he gets up, grabs a dirty shirt and cleans up the mess that Fili had made on both of them. Kili curls around him mere moments later.

 

At some point they must fall asleep, because there’s nocking on the door and Ori’s familiar voice coming through the doorway.

 

“Alright, I gave the both of you two hours, I’m done being sexiled now! The two of you better have clothes on!”

 

“Gimme a minute, Ori!” Kili calls out, rolling off the bed and pulling on a pair of sweats. He grabs another pair for Fili, coaxes his legs in and then past his hips to cover up the important bits.

 

“Okay, you’re good!”

 

Ori enters the room, takes a look at the two of them and rolls his eyes at the fact that neither one is wearing a shirt.

 

“I love being privy to the hickeys, love bites, and scratch marks. Truly, I do.”

 

Fili mumbles in response, shifts in the bed and reaches out his arms for Kili. He doesn’t even say anything, just makes a tiny whine of a noise and makes grabby hands. Kili lies back down on the bed; the blond curling an arm around his waist and a leg thrown over his hip. His face nuzzles against the hair on his chest.

 

“My god, you’re both even worse in post-orgasmic bliss. I’m going to need to soap my eyes because of this.”

 

“Mhm. Put something on Netflix, yeah? Sleepy.”

 

Ori snorts, but he complies, watching his two friends fall back asleep as they stay curled around one another. He’ll never admit it out loud, but they’re adorable as hell.

 

God dammit.

* * *

 

Let me know what you think! And if you wish, stop by letterstoshakespear on tumblr! :) Have a nice day, folks!


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